Sanctum
by GwendolynTalbot
Summary: EO! Olivia and Elliot infiltrate a cult and Elliot soon learns that Liv has PTSD. Will she open up to him about Sealview, and how will he react? With their lives on the line they depend on each other and their feelings soon become clear.
1. Chapter 1

**This is set in season 10, towards the end of the season, and the only thing I have changed is that Elliot and Kathy have been divorced for over a year. I like Kathy, but I want a plausible EO focus, and so have taken her out of the equation. This story is T rated - for violence and non graphic sexual situations, but in keeping with the level you would see on the show. Couldn't help briefly mentioning Elliot's dislike of her boyfriends - for more on my take on that, please take a look at my one shot: Understanding. :-)**

 **A few scenes relate to Undercover (season 9) and PTSD (season 10). It always seemed a bit odd to me that Elliot would not have realised Olivia had PTSD given the amount of time they spent together, so I wanted to visit that.**

 **I found recently that experiencing something potentially traumatic a second time, but getting through it differently can be very healing. In this story Olivia will be in a situation which she will emerge from stronger - but she won't try to get through it alone, because Elliot is her best friend and he would be there for her.**

 **I do not own anything relating to this awesome show, unfortunately.**

 **EO as always :-)**

Captain Cragen stood by his office window, looking out across the squad room. It was a busy hive of activity, two separate women had come in to report attacks, and they were still investigating a more complex case which was already stretching their resources pretty thin.

Olivia sat with one of the victims in an interview room, having taken her through the crowded, noisy squad room to somewhere she knew she would feel safer and more able to open up. Fin was out chasing a lead for the case which had kept them tied up for two weeks now, Elliot was interviewing a suspect and Munch was talking to the other victim.

He knew that if they didn't catch a break soon then the likelihood of getting a prosecution was pretty thin, but he knew after two weeks they had each put everything into locating the suspect - a father who had raped and killed the babysitter. The suspect, having taken off and covering his tracks far too well, had seemed to vanish off the face of the earth.

He hoped that today especially no other cases would come in, as they wouldn't be able to handle any more work. He considered that he might have a case for expanding the unit, but was also grateful that his detectives were all working so seamlessly together.

Noticing Fin come in and make himself a coffee before heading straight to the interrogation room to assist Elliot, he smiled a little. All of the detectives on his team were extremely dedicated, and he was thankful for that.

With the arrival of a lawyer for the suspect, Cragen escorted him to the interrogation room where he promptly ended the dialogue. This was common practice but Elliot was still frustrated that he had got nowhere after an hour of interrogating. Exiting the room, he and Fin entered the next room adjoining to Olivia.

"Another thirty minutes and I would've broke him," Elliot said, annoyed.

"Tell me about it Staber, I just been chasing a dead end all day."

"This week has been relentless, we can't seem to catch a break at the moment," Elliot said.

"It'll come. I gotta update the captain," Fin replied, as he headed out towards Cragen's office.

Elliot glanced through the two way mirror, frustrated that the suspect that he was sure was the girl's attacker, had not just talked for a bit longer. The lawyer had the worst timing.

A teenage girl sat in a chair opposite Olivia Benson. Her eyes were red and her clothes and hair in disarray. She had been close to hyperventilating when she first came in, but an hour later, having given Olivia her statement, she had calmed down considerably. Elliot wished that he could have tapped on the glass and told Olivia that the suspect had confessed - but the girl's attacker would be going home tonight.

He had always admired Olivia's skill with victims - this girl was a prime example. Near hysterical when she came in to the busy squad room, Olivia soon calmed her, and when it appeared that she did not need urgent medical treatment, she took her statement. He knew that Olivia would go with her while she had a rape kit done, and he knew that she would help her get home too. He didn't understand why he found it so hard to talk to Olivia recently - perhaps it was just because they were working on multiple cases and just didn't seem to have time to even pause for thought.

After Olivia left with the victim, Elliot took out his cell phone and sent her a message.

 _\- Let's get a coffee once you're finished._

He paused, then hit send, wondering why he felt the need to hesitate - after all, he was simply catching up with his partner. Glancing at the clock on the wall, he decided to send another message:

 _\- Doesn't matter how late it is, been a crazy week_.

Putting his phone back in his pocket, he looked up as a man entered the squad room, looking around expectantly.

"Excuse me, I want to report an assault," he said.

Elliot sighed inwardly, as he headed over to the man and got right back to work.

 **MARY'S DINER**

It was almost three hours later when Elliot, now sitting in a diner not far from the precinct and holding a mug of coffee in one hand, heard his phone beep to indicate that he had a message. Picking it up he took a look.

 _\- Free now - still want that drink? Liv._

He smiled at her message before putting down his coffee and taking his phone in both hands, typing her a reply.

 _\- I'm at Mary's - wanna meet me here?_

Within seconds she replied.

 _\- Sure, be there soon._

He put his phone down and picked his coffee back up, taking a sip as he sat and waited.

Olivia entered the diner twenty minutes later, as Elliot was on his second coffee. He noticed her before she spotted him and smiled slightly, waving to her as her eyes scanned the room.

She paused as she spoke to the passing waitress, ordering her drink and then walked over to join him at the table.

"How'd it go?" He asked.

"It was rough, but I dropped her off at her mother's so she won't be alone tonight," she said, as she shrugged off her coat and sat down.

"That's good," Elliot replied, swallowing a mouthful of coffee. "Cragen got a call about a potential case - looks like something quite involved - as if we had the time for more. Is it just me or is it getting sicker out there?"

"Seems like that sometimes," she said, leaning back against the cushioned seat, suddenly feeling tired as she noticed the clock on the wall which reminded her of how few her hours of sleep had become lately.

"So what is the case?" she asked.

"Some cult, a girl reported being held against her will by them. She walked into the precinct earlier today - disclosed sexual assault but didn't get further than the front desk. She turned and ran so we gotta try and track her down."

Olivia looked slightly uncomfortable as she pondered what he had just told her, until Elliot spoke again.

"So how was your date the other night?"

"Robert? Well...I don't think that's going anywhere," she shrugged.

"Really, I thought it was going well - its been what...three months?"

"You only don't hate him because I haven't let you meet him yet El!" Olivia joked.

"What's wrong with him then?" Elliot asked.

" _Nothing_ , but you tend to... _dislike.._ anyone I go out with," she replied with honesty.

"I just want you to find the right person Liv, someone that's good enough for you."

She smiled and thanked the waitress as she placed her coffee on the table in front of her.

"Well this one definitely wasn't," she said sardonically.

Elliot immediately looked concerned.

"Why Liv? Anything you wanna tell me about?"

"It's fine - we just aren't right for each other, that's all. Now can we stop talking about my lack of a love life please!"

"OK...I just assumed you were happy with the guy…."

Olivia sighed and took a sip of her coffee before looking at Elliot.

"He just seemed a bit too interested in the job you know, one of those," Olivia replied with a shrug.

Elliot studied her carefully, not quite believing her easy dismissal of his concerns, and equally as unable to shake the feeling that he should push her to talk about it.

Olivia met his scrutinizing gaze and shook her head.

"Can we just drop it please?"

"Liv… what's the _real_ story?" he said, deciding not to let her dismiss this so easily.

"El, it's fine really. _I just_ …" Olivia paused struggling to find the right words so that she wouldn't ignite Elliot's interest. "I was getting uncomfortable with his interest in the job - too many questions. Maybe that's just me being suspicious, I don't know. He wasn't at the same level of some of the other guys I've met though," and she looked at Elliot, expecting a remark at her admission - and was surprised when he didn't react.

"You gave me nothing on him, you know," Elliot said.

"What do you mean?" asked Olivia.

"Well, you were pretty guarded about his personal information and I only had a first name to go on."

"To go on _for what?_ " Olivia paused, confused before realisation took hold. "Oh God El, _please_ don't tell me you were checking up on him."

"I couldn't, you didn't give me enough...but did _you_?"

Olivia cleared her throat, slightly embarrassed to admit the fact that she had done herself, exactly what she had prevented Elliot from doing.

" _Yes,"_ she sighed. "He doesn't have any charges against him but he has been arrested twice. I was already…. _uncomfortable_ and then I checked him out on the system and...well I ended it last night."

"Really, just like that - what did you find out? Why were you uncomfortable?" Elliot asked, his voice taking on an edge of concern..

Olivia sighed, tensing as she began speaking.

"He was arrested because of a parent's accusation about sexual assault on a 15 year old girl, but the charges were dropped. A year later he was arrested at a raid on a 'religious retreat' - it was part of a group who meet regularly in the city. There were no … accusations _were_ made, but then dropped "

"Liv..that's really concerning," Elliot said as he studied her response carefully.

"You don't have to tell _me_ that! As soon as I got the police report I ended it with him."

"He take that OK? I mean...he doesn't sound like the most stable person," Elliot asked cautiously.

"He wasn't happy, but he didn't get physical or anything if that's what you mean."

Elliot relaxed visibly at Olivia's words, and returned to his coffee now that it had cooled somewhat.

"He is still part of that group El - I've... been with him to a meeting."

"What? When did you get religious?" Elliot asked, surprised.

" _I didn't_ , but he is, and he had been talking about it more and more - it was something that was important to him, and I wanted to show him I was taking on board what mattered to him. If I had known about his record I never would have got that far."

"Did you ask him about the arrests?"

"Yeah. He...said the leaders of his group have been scapegoated and no one there has ever harmed anyone...I don't know though El. I only went once, and it seemed pretty misogynistic to me," she sighed. "I was really uncomfortable." her hesitation was obvious to Elliot.

"What is it?" he asked.

"Did the girl who came in today say what the name of the group was?"

"Um...yeah, I think it was The Sanctum," he paused. "Liv, is it connected?"

Olivia sighed and brought the mug to her lips, wincing as she swallowed down the hot coffee more quickly than she had intended before placing it back down on to the table and looking at Elliot.

"Sometimes El, I would just like my personal life to be a little more uneventful."

"What do you mean?"

" _Robert's 'religion'...it's The Sanctum."_

 **PRECINCT**

The next day Olivia arrived early, she headed straight to Cragen's office, and was relieved to see that they were the only two there, and she brought him up to speed on what she knew about The Sanctum. Cragen was undoubtedly surprised at the sudden insight they had gained into an otherwise potential dead end, but slightly cautious about the turn that the conversation was now taking.

"I've thought about this for half the night Captain, I have known him for three months and I've been there. I can easily infiltrate - I only ended it with him on Tuesday - reconciling would be easy - and I could get inside, find out if they have any other retreats, and locate the girl."

"Olivia, I need to think about this," He said, not without an air of discomfort.

Olivia looked slightly offended at Cragen's hesitance ..

"I can tell him I want to have some distance, but think it might work between us if we both just have some time - and that his group 'reached me'. That'll get us in."

"I just want to be sure you are not getting into a situation we can't control from our end, Liv. If you're in there, you'll be unarmed and our ability to back you up will be minimal. I don't like it."

Olivia sat down, clearly annoyed, but full of adrenalin from the plans that had been racing through her head since she woke, earlier than planned, having been unable to put the case out of her mind,.

"I don't want to ignore my gut again Olivia - I should have listened to my instincts last time _but I didn't_ and you got hurt."

"This is different - he knows I'm a cop, their members come from all different backgrounds, all I need to do is play along, pretend that I buy their spiel," she said, quickly dismissing the captain's words.

Cragen sat back in his chair and looked at Olivia, feeling a big sense of unease about her plan. He took a long pause before giving a reply.

"Are you ready to go undercover again Olivia?" he finally asked, and that question came with with an air of genuine concern.

"Captain, I'm fine, I can handle this - I _want_ to do this."

"Go and compile everything that you have on them, names, locations, whatever you witnessed when you were there. I will give it some thought and we can talk later, _once_ I have an idea what we're up against here. I'm not going to take a chance of putting you at risk, Olivia."

She gave a sigh and began to walk out of the door, before turning back.

"I'm the _only_ way in Captain, and that girl came to us asking for help for a reason."

He leaned back in his chair, considering her words as he watched her leave his office.

 **OLIVIA'S APARTMENT**

Olivia's dreams were filled with images that she wanted out of her head and feelings that wore her down - weakened her, made her vulnerable. She woke at 3 am, the dream still fresh in her mind and the feeling of unease not shifting. Glancing at her phone, she willed it to ring so that she had a legitimate reason to be pacing her apartment in the middle of the night, and not letting her mind wander back to her last undercover operation.

Try as she might, she couldn't shake the swarm of negative emotions which she had woken up to. Her conversation with Cragen had taken her right back to the day that she had convinced him to let her go undercover at Sealview, and despite feeling positive that she could handle it, when he expressed his concern it brought everything back to her.

She glanced back at her clock - it was a long way to go until she could arrive at Cragen's office at a sensible time. If he knew that she had been awake since 3am unable to shake the images which had come back with a vengeance to haunt her, he would _never_ approve the operation.

Sitting down on her couch, she took a deep breath and closed her eyes hoping that sleep would come easily, so that she wouldn't appear exhausted the next day.

 **PRECINCT**

Olivia was one of the first to arrive, but as soon as she reached her desk she could see that the captain's office was full. From her perspective by her desk, she could make out three men - they appeared to all be talking with relative calm and composure, and Olivia assumed this meant they were likely to be law enforcement officials in some capacity.

"What's going on in there?" Elliot's voice came from behind her.

Turning to look at him, she smiled appreciatively as she noticed he carried two cups of coffee.

Holding one out to her, she accepted it and sat down.

"Thanks, just what I needed," she said,

Elliot joined her, taking his place at his desk opposite hers.

"Why are you here so early?" she asked.

"I figured you would be, so I may as well join you," he shrugged.

Olivia gave a small smile of appreciation, before looking up as Cragen's door opened.

The three men exited the door and Cragen escorted them out, walking past the detectives desks toward the elevator.

When he returned, he headed back toward his office, pausing at the door as he turned and spoke.

"Olivia..." he said, not needing to finish his sentence.

Olivia rose and walked toward his office.

"Who were they?" she asked, taking a seat opposite his desk.

Cragen closed his door and leant against his desk.

"Olivia, I did give this some serious thought and I was not going to approve your request."

Olivia got to her feet, preparing herself for an argument, when Cragen raised his hand to silence her.

" _But_ \- the FBI have been here for two hours, I've reached a point of compromise that I think will work for everyone. Olivia, I don't doubt your capabilities for a second, but I do not want to drop you into something like this just yet. I think you need more time before you take an op like this."

"What happened last year would not affect my ability to do this, captain," she began, irritated at herself when she felt tears prickling behind her eyes. Determined not to reduce herself to crying, she took a deep breath and focused, shaking off the effects of her lack of sleep which were wearing her down already, "I _can_ handle this, I promise you."

"I don't doubt that for a moment Olivia, but I have a duty of care to you."

"I was with you in the interrogation room Liv, _you said he tried to rape you_ \- and I have regrets about how the whole situation was handled - you needed more support than you got."

"Captain," Olivia began, momentarily closing her eyes as her tears abated and frustration took hold. "I'm fine! I didn't need any help. You can't seriously stop me from doing my job because of this!" she said, her emotions beginning to charge her words.

Cragen sighed.

"My answer to your request was no Liv, _but_ I was left with the choice of you going with the FBI or convincing them that we should run the op, so you'll have _our people_ watching your back, but with their involvement. I won the case, it's a compromise I can go with," he said firmly.

Olivia sat down, relaxing somewhat now that she knew that she did not have to fight for this.

"Thank you," she said softly.

Thirty minutes later, Munch and Fin had arrived and were already deep into the multiple cases they were juggling. Elliot was doing his best to give them his attention but his mind was elsewhere, wondering what olivia was doing.

"Hey Stabler, I _said,_ do you have the witness statement?" Fin said, irritated.

"Sorry," Elliot replied, reaching to a stack of folders on his desk, before hesitating.

"Um...which one?"

"The one I asked you for three times - the Masterson case," Fin continued.

"Yeah...here ya go," he said, producing a file and passing it to Fin.

"What's Liv up to in there?" Elliot said, his question aimed at no one in particular.

"Well, you tell us, what's your partner done to be in there for this long?" Munch asked.

Cagen suddenly opened his door and they all looked up, making no doubt as to what they were all discussing. Elliot was relieved when Cragen called them inside.

Cragen briefed them, and handed over to Olivia once the practicalities were explained, Olivia filled her team in on everything she knew about The Sanctum. They all listened intently, Elliot growing increasingly tense as Olivia explained how her ex boyfriend's behaviour had become stranger over time, as he asked more questions about her work and pushed for information - which she did not give.

"Olivia is therefore our link to this organisation, and I agree that her involvement is invaluable here, _but_ \- I want one of our people in there with you Olivia. I will not send _any_ of my people into an op without someone I trust watching their back."

"I'll go," Elliot said, wasting no time in volunteering.

"El, are you sure?" Olivia said.

"Absolutely. It's not an issue. _I'm your partner._ If you're doing this, then i'm going with you," he said with a finality that the others knew would mean any challenge would be futile.

Cragen sat back in his chair and observed them as Olivia took over, relaying the information that she had on the cult.

"When do we leave?" Elliot asked.

"Two days," Olivia replied.

"OK, two days to work up a believable scenario to get both Olivia and Elliot through the doors and gaining the trust of these wackos. What's the game plan?" Munch asked.


	2. Chapter 2

**Thanks to all those who are reading, this chapter is a bit longer than the average and will get the story moving. The next one is mainly written so wont be too long.**

 **I do not own the characters of the Law and Order SVU universe in any way.**

 **This story is only posted on ff . net if you see it elsewhere please let me know, I request that this story, as with all of the others I have written are not copied and posted elsewhere. There is a lot of that going on at the moment, so give me a shout if you notice it! Thanks guys!**

 **TWO DAYS LATER**.

Olivia and Elliot sat at a table in a bar a few blocks from Olivia's apartment. They had gone over their briefing repeatedly, and both felt as comfortable as they could be. Olivia adjusted the gold bracelet on her wrist which contained the GPS transmitter and wire for the rest of the team in a nearby van.

Looking at her phone, Olivia picked it up, pressing a button to read her incoming message.

"He's almost here," she said, putting her phone back onto the table, "Ready?"

Elliot nodded, "Ready."

Within a minute, she glanced up and smiled as she saw her ex boyfriend approach their table.

She stood and he took her into his arms, releasing her to kiss her on the cheek before they both sat down again. Reaching across the table to Elliot, he extended his hand.

"Detective Stabler - I'm Robert Larson," he said.

Elliot nodded, shaking his hand.

"It's Elliot."

"OK," smiled Robert, before turning to Olivia.

"I'm really glad you called, Olivia. I knew that you wouldn't turn your back on us - and I'm so happy that you were touched by the meeting," he smiled.

"Elliot and I...I was telling him about the situation we were involved in...It was bad and I can't...face anything right now - I need to just feel secure and I just... _feel so crushed right now_ ," she began, as she spoke one of their many well rehearsed lines.

"Olivia has told you all about us?" Robert said, as he placed his hand on Olivia's and raised his eyes to meet Elliot's.

Elliot's eyes wavered momentarily when he noticed Robert's hand on Olivia's. Robert wouldn't have noticed it, he was was certain of that, but he hoped that Olivia hadn't spotted his tension.

"Yes. The retreat she heard about, it sounds perfect - I just want out... _of everything_. People died...and it was the hardest case I've ever been involved in, I feel responsible, and...I mean, where do you go from there?" he said, Olivia nodding slightly as Elliot spoke his lines with a convincing accuracy.

"We can do that - we can save you from yourselves - we can cleanse you from the blood on your hands," Robert said, his voice low and serious.

In an unmarked van parked around the corner, Fin, Munch and Cragen listened in.

"He's buying it," Fin said.

"Fantasists are so caught up in their own spiel that they don't see why anyone else wouldn't be too," Munch replied, his concentration not diverting from his colleagues voices over the wire, "They'll make a move soon."

Olivia and Elliot talked convincingly for over twenty minutes, and were relieved when he finally suggested that they leave with him. Finally they all left the bar together, Robert's hand resting lightly on Olivia's arm, guiding her to his car.

"Get in," he smiled at them both.

They drove through the busy traffic, until eventually they began to see less and less crowded streets, and more land surrounding them. It was becoming stuffy and hot in the car by the time they eventually pulled to a stop along a road, and Robert switched off the engine, gesturing for them to get out.

Olivia gave Elliot a confused glance as she surveyed their surroundings. Slamming the door behind him, Elliot leaned against the car folding his arms as he watched Robert cautiously.

"Where are we?" he asked.

He was acutely aware that they were on a wide open road, and there were no signs of other vehicles nearby. The wire would only transmit on a short range frequency, so he was only too aware, as he was certain that Olivia was too, that their current location was probably not known.

"We are waiting for a ride," Robert said.

"What's wrong with your car?" Elliot asked, working hard to keep the suspicion and distrust from his voice.

"We like to keep cars away from this place - it's a safe haven and we keep it unspoiled and protected."

Looking up, they followed his gaze as a vehicle came into view in the distance. Olivia glanced at Elliot, realising as he did, that it was _not_ their tail - they were totally out of range and if they switched vehicles then the chance of locating them would be drastically reduced...

They stood in silence, their thoughts unspoken but Olivia and Elliot's concerns easily communicated to each other with a simple glance.

As a truck pulled to a stop behind the car, dust and dirt appeared in small clouds around the tires as the earth was disturbed by the weight of the vehicle, and then Robert turned to them.

"Now your journey can begin. I am so happy Olivia, that I reached you - and you have in turn reached Elliot. You will both be cleansed."

The driver of the truck climbed down and walked toward them, holding out a bag to Robert. He accepted, returning to Olivia and Elliot.

"We protect the privacy of our retreat - only the leaders and outreachers know how to get there. I hope you both understand," he said, smiling.

He walked toward the truck and gestured for them to follow - they exchanged a cautious glance as they followed him to back of the truck where the doors had been opened.

The driver of the van approached them, studying them like specimens.

"Gotta blindfold you both," he said, as he produced some dark material, moving to Olivia first and tying it around her head, covering her eyes completely. She tensed, not liking the turn this was taking, but kept her composure.

"Why is that necessary - we won't see anything from inside the van…" Elliot said.

"Humour him Elliot," smiled Robert.

Elliot shrugged and allowed the driver to put the blindfold on him, and guide him up a step into the back of the truck, where he sat down with his back against a wall. He heard a clatter on the metal step as they escorted Olivia in, and he tried hard to hear where she was, and whether they would be alone - if both men were leaving to ride at the front.

Once they were both blindfolded they became acutely aware of the silence around them - no sounds of other vehicles and no movement from Robert or the driver. The both remained tense waiting for the next move.

Almost simultaneously, they both felt the sharp pain of a needle piercing their skin. Elliot cursed as he realised instantly that he had been injected with something. He knew that Olivia had also when he heard her struggling. Ripping off his blindfold, he jumped up, moving quickly forward to grab Robert, who was holding Olivia still.

"No, _Olivia don't_ _fight_ \- trust me - you have to give yourself to this... in twenty minutes you will both just sleep the rest of the way. We're not gonna hurt you," Robert said, as Elliot got a hold of him.

As Robert released his hold on Olivia, Elliot let him go and took a step closer toward her as she pulled off her blindfold.

"What the hell did you inject us with?" Elliot asked.

"It's just an anaesthetic, it works faster given more precisely, but this way you'll both be out in twenty minutes or so. Don't fight it, you'll be out for several hours," Robert said, as he stepped towards the door. "Only outreachers can know the location of our retreat."

The driver jumped out, with Robert quickly following - Elliot made a move for the door, but they were too quick locking it behind them and within moments there was a jolt as the truck began to move again.

Elliot rubbed his hand across the back of his neck, sighing in annoyance as he put his hand on the door, steadying himself against the motion of the truck.

"Liv, it's a crude way to knock us out - it'll take a while to have any effect."

"OK...the truck has turned around - it's heading back in the direction it came from...so we're headed...north. Listen for any sounds, anything that could tell us where we are," Olivia said.

Elliot sighed, moving away from the door and sat down next to her, realising as he leant back against the wall that he had sat down much closer than he intended. He tensed a little and almost shifted position but glanced at her slightly, and not seeing any sign that she wanted him to give her more space he relaxed.

"They could be catching us up right now," he said.

Olivia raised her arm up and used her other hand to touch her bracelet carefully.

"As long as this does it's job they'll hear us."

Elliot reached for her bracelet and touched the larger charm which housed the GPS transmitter. His arm brushed against hers as he reached, and his fingers glanced against the bare skin of her wrist, causing a small involuntary shiver from her which she appeared to either ignore or not notice. Elliot paused, wondering why he had even felt the urge to touch the transmitter, and why he hadn't removed his hand yet. In truth the light contact with her skin was creating conflicting emotions within him...The sensation just seemed natural yet he also felt that he should stop.

His touch lingered, as he considered why he wasn't retracting his hand - Olivia hadn't moved, hadn't shown him any sign that she felt his touch inappropriate. His continued contact as they both remained silent, their eyes falling to her wrist, seemed to make the air heavier around them. They had never touched for this long, there was always a careful physical distance separating them, but he couldn't quite drop his hand away from her.

He glanced at Olivia, noticing her eyes were fixed firmly on the bracelet, and he swallowed as he realised his thumb was rubbing small circles on the inside of her wrist. He wanted to put his arm around her - and he considered for one brief moment what she might think if he actually did that...

He let out a sigh as he dropped his hand back on to his knee and turned his head just enough to see her. She mirrored his actions, her hand falling to her lap as she turned her eyes meeting his.

"Liv..." he said with a thickness to his voice that surprised him.

Olivia rested her head against the wall as she continued looking into his eyes, unsure of what to say at that moment. The intimacy if the moment was certainly not lost on her - she felt a warmth at his closeness, and even though his hand had dropped away from her, she could almost feel his touch on her wrist.

"Yeah..." Olivia said, quietly as she left the moment to to him - wanting to see where he would take it, _if he even would._

Elliot leaned his head back against the wall, diverting his eyes from hers - he wanted to say so much to her, but if he began he didn't really know what he would say...what he might _regret_ saying. His intent was confusing, even to him, and he was afraid of where his words would lead - and if she would shut down and step away from him if he voiced anything.

Sighing he let his words remain locked in his mind - they silently remained there, hidden and unspoken, but Elliot could handle that - because this bond they shared, this indescribable connection - it went far beyond words, and he knew that she understood that too. He was far too uncertain of the implications that discarding his restraint, and speaking his words, would bring.

They both remained quiet, hearing nothing but the sound of the wheels on the road, until they eventually had no choice but to sleep.

 **SURVEILLANCE VAN**

"DAMN IT!" Cragen shouted.

"How did we lose them?" he demanded.

"Something was jamming the signal," Fin replied.

"There are three points within a 30 miles radius of the city where communications and signals cut out - black spots in communication. A friend...investigated it last year - there was a rumour that there were secret government bases nearby that were jamming signals," Munch said.

"Your friend, Munch? What did _your friend_ find out?" Fin asked.

"Well not so much a friend...as an ex...she didn't find anything to convince me, but she's still pretty sure," Munch shrugged.

"The signal dropped suddenly so we can assume they hit one of those black spots. Munch - point them out," Cragen said, as he brought up a map on the screen.

"They could be too far to pick up again if they kept moving," Fin said.

"Let's get uniforms out to these two spots," he said, pointing at the screen.

"We can take this one, it's the direction they were headed, and the most likely," Cragen said.

 _Within thirty minutes Fin and Munch arrived at the blackspot Munch had quite precisely identified. The car pulled over to the side of the road as they glanced around, spotting the car Olivia and Elliot had left in._

 _"That's Larson's car, bastard switched on us." Fin said, annoyed._

" _This is a pretty desolate area - no houses or businesses - but there is a filling station down the road some fifteen miles or so. It's the only thing around here for miles." Munch said. "I surveyed this area..with some friends - figured it was worth looking into, but we didn't find anything. We did talk to the very bored man at the filling station though - he notices everything - doesn't have a whole lot else to do, its a quiet out of town route. He was pretty helpful, he has CCTV hooked up out the front, it catches the passing cars - good chance we can find the one they switched to."_

 _Driving onwards, they both remained hopeful that their only lead would give them some clue as to their friends whereabouts._

 **UNDISCLOSED LOCATION**

Elliot awoke gradually, his mind a fog of confusion as he opened his eyes and sat up groggily. Looking around him he soon realised he was lying on a bed - not a particularly comfortable bed, but certainly not the accommodation of someone who had been abducted. Feeling a little less tense he sat up slowly, taking in his surroundings.

He was in a large room windowless room which he assumed to be a basement. The room was filled with beds identical to the one he was sleeping on - he counted six against the wall opposite him and the same number appeared to be on his side of the room. All of the other beds were empty and neatly made, although each only appeared to consist of one blanket. The room was sparse apart from the beds - and the only exit: a single solid door.

Elliot stood up, still feeling the after effects of the anesthetic that they had been injected with.

Moving over to the door, he cautiously tried the handle and was surprised when it moved freely - opening the door he left the room.

He was met with a dull corridor, also devoid of natural light and furnishings. Glancing around he could only see two other doors and he decided to try the one on the opposite wall first.

Approaching, he listened at the door first and when convinced that he could hear no sound, he opened the door slowly.

This room was identical to the one he had left and as his eyes scanned the room, he let out a sigh of relief realizing that Olivia lay on the only occupied bed. Quickly approaching her, he crouched down next to her bed, placing his hand on her arm and shook her gently.

"Liv...wake up," he whispered, not wanting to alert anyone to their presence until they had a chance to touch base.

"Come on Liv," he said, his hand moving to her head, and lightly touching her face as he pushed a loose strand of hair back. Watching her for a moment, he leaned down whispering in her ear. "Come on Liv, wake up - we gotta talk about the game plan before anyone gets here."

" _Mmmmm..."_ she murmured, beginning to rouse.

Elliot continued to gently jostle her, bringing her gradually back to consciousness. Soon she sleepily opened her eyes, and began to focus on him.

"Elliot," she began drowsily, "Where are we?"

"I'm not sure, could be a large basement," Elliot said, a hint of irritation to his voice.

He gave her time to rouse as he walked around the room, looking in vain for anything of interest. Within a few minutes she was far more coherent and eased herself up in the bed to a sitting position.

"I wasn't expecting that - I'm still wearing the bracelet though, so they haven't found the transmitter. Once the others catch us up they'll get our signal," she said, battling a fog of dizziness and confusion.

"Not down here...when you get upstairs, take it off and stash it somewhere. Outside if possible - don't let them get a good look at it," Elliot said.

"OK," Olivia replied, as she put her hand to her head. "What did they hit us with? she asked, wincing.

"Anaesthetic I guess, just didn't see that coming," Elliot shrugged.

"You're both awake, good," a voice from behind them said.

Elliot turned sharply, to see who had come into the room without them noticing.

Olivia sat up further, still somewhat drowsy, to see Robert standing in the open doorway.

"Up you get Olivia, time to meet some people," Robert said.

Olivia stood unsteadily, and did not protest when Elliot helped her to her feet, but soon stepped ahead of him as they followed Robert through the door.

 **PRECINCT**

Munch walked quickly toward Cragen's office, glancing at Fin as he walked past.

"Got it," he said.

Fin stood and joined him as he entered Cragen's office.

"Munch - any luck?" Cragen asked.

"Yes - several phone calls, and emails but I have an invite to the wackos meeting tonight," Munch said.

"And the first call you made was to your ex wife? The one who thinks her phone loses signal because of a secret government plot?" Fin asked.

"No, this is a different ex wife," Munch said, as Fin gave a slight smile and shook his head.

"Make some friends there tonight John, we have to find out where our people are," Cragen said. "Fin, how are we doing on the vehicle traces?"

"The filling station employee had very little traffic going past so we have only three vehicles."

Fin left the room and returned to his desk, and Munch began heading out of the door, when Cragen stopped him.

"Oh, and John?" he called, as Munch turned to look at him.

"Let's avoid calling them 'wackos' to their faces OK?" Cragen said.

"I'll try," Munch said as he left the room.

Cragen visibly relaxed at the news that Munch had managed to get an invitation to the meeting that night - he felt less out of control of the situation and determined to locate the rest of his team and close this case quickly.

 **UNDISCLOSED LOCATION**

Olivia and Elliot stood in a small dark room, they were still underground and had seen no hint as to where the route to the outside might be. Robert stood with them, his hand now in Olivia's as he looked at her and smiled.

"I'm so glad you came - once you let go of everything that binds you - you'll be open to love," he said, smiling at her in a way that made Elliot want to wrench his hand away from Olivia's, and land a punch on him. Stiffening, Elliot focused on playing his role - he reminded himself of their scenario and tried not to look at the creep who Olivia had quite rightfully thrown out of her life just a few days ago, but was now smiling at. Elliot knew that she was playing her role also, but it irked him to see her smiling and holding his hand.

It took everything he had not to push Robert away and take Olivia's hand in his own instead. He surprised himself as this thought ran through his head - he was acutely aware that he didn't just feel annoyed on behalf of Olivia that she had to play nice with this guy, but mainly, he felt a pang of jealousy.

Looking away and staring at the door, waiting for something to happen to break the moment he felt suddenly trapped in, he tried to push the feeling aside. This was Olivia, his best friend and partner of over a decade, and he was feeling jealous of her playing a role and pretending to be interested in someone...He began to wonder if perhaps he always had felt jealous. She was right..he never did like her boyfriends….this one though.. _.he_ topped the list of men he wanted to get _out_ of Olivia's life.

The door opened and a man walked in. He was tall, with short dark hair, and dressed all in black.

"Robert - what have you brought me?" he said, his eyes moving from Elliot to Olivia as he studied them carefully.

"This is Olivia - my girlfiend, and.."

"Robert?" the man replied, a smile forming which did not reach his eyes.

"Um..she.." Robert began uncertainly.

"We do not form such relationships here - we do not exclusively covet the women," he said, as he stared hard at Robert.

"I'm sorry...I didn't well..I was just explaining how I know them.."

"No problem - we are all friends here are we not?" smiled the man again. "We normally like to get to know you through our meetings, but Robert has been working outside of our base for sometime and has spent considerable time with you Olivia. You're both at a turning point in your lives - you need to be saved, and I can do that. I understand your needs."

He walked closer, stopping in front of Elliot at first and staring at him with a scrutinizing gaze.

"You're police officers. We have had such upsetting... _discrimination_ from the police. We thrive on trust here - we are all open - we have no secrets and we accept everyone here - but if you want to be a part of our very unique family - then you must leave yourself behind - here you become someone new - a blank canvas - can you do that Elliot?" he said, his gaze remaining fixed.

"Yeah..I can do that...I want to do that," Elliot replied, not allowing his eye contact to break.

He stepped back and looked from Elliot to Olivia.

"I'm Emery. Our world here - _is very special_ \- it has it's own rules, its own morals - we are a society of our own making," he said as he stepped closer to Olivia, his eyes dropping to her hand which was still intertwined with Robert's.

Reaching out he took hold of Robert's hand, removing his hold on Olivia's. Robert stepped away, not realising until that moment that he had not relinquished his hold on her.

"Thank you," said Emery as he looked at Robert, his gaze boring into him for several seconds, "Go and collect some more suitable clothing for the new members of our family."

Robert turned and left, closing the door behind him softly.

Emery watched the door close, before turning back to Olivia.

"I have a mistrust of the police - they have, on more than one occasion..attempted to destroy our carefully built way of life. Forgive me...you will prove yourselves to me... _and soon_ ," he said, with a low carefully controlled voice as he raised his hand and touched Olivia's cheek.

Olivia resisted the urge to push his hand away and she silently hoped that Elliot would remain composed and not intervene - _this she could cope with_. Cragen was wrong...it wasn't too soon for her to go under this deep…

She couldn't however, help her natural impulse to move away from him and brought her hands up to his to attempt to push him away.

Emery raised his other hand and placed both hands on either side of her head, his thumbs

brushing her cheeks as he gripped her tightly to stop her from moving away. Leaning closer he stared intently, his hands holding her almost painfully as he began to speak in a low voice.

"You shall be cleansed - your grief and pain will not exist…"

Olivia's breath began to quicken, as his voice gradually became a muffled sound in the background. She tried to concentrate on his words, but she could barely make anything out. She felt herself trembling as his muffled voice began to be replaced with other words - she knew they were the _wrong_ words, the man in front of her was not speaking them...but they jumped at her out of the distorted voices which seemed to swarm around her in a mass of confusion.

" _Shut up._ " _Harris's voice, echoed._

Her breathing turned to short, rapid breaths as her mind began to fill with a fog of confusion.

She struggled to keep a grip on where she was and what she was doing there….

"Olivia...are you alright?" Elliot's voice permeated her subconscious somewhere, sounding like a distant echo, but she couldn't hold on, couldn't tell where his voice was coming from..she began to tremble and shiver despite feeling increasingly warmer.

" _Bite me, and you're dead._ "

That voice - she knew it didn't belong here. Olivia tried to push it away...get it out of her head but she was losing herself now. Elliot's voice faded into the background, joining the muffled voices still dancing around her.

 _Fear. Adrenalin. Shock. Confusion. Too much._ It all coursed through her at once, consuming her completely,and she felt herself shaking, _hard_.

"Olivia!" Elliot's voice, swimming up toward her - pushing through the fog, reaching her now as her breath turned to gasps. " _Liv!_ _Olivia_!" Elliot's voice pierced through her haze, stilling her, bringing her back to him.

Olivia began to focus and took a deep breath as she snapped out of it only to feel Emery's hands on her head.

Feeling another jolt of adrenalin mixed with a confused panic, she bought both hands up and shoved against his chest, as hard as she could.

He released his hold immediately, and taken by surprise he stumbled back. Elliot stepped in between her and Emery, and once he was certain that there was going to be no retaliation he turned to Olivia.

"Liv?"

She breathed deeply, struggling to take back control of her breath, looking around the room slowly as she got her bearings and realised that she was right there, where she had been the whole time. Still trembling, she turned to Elliot.

"I'm OK... _just need a minute,_ " she said as she looked at him, her eyes slightly glazed but finding focus as she concentrated on him and fought to gain control of her breathing.

Elliot carefully placed a hand on her shoulder and looked into her eyes, a slight realisation dawning on him as he processed her reaction in his mind.

"Look at me Liv... _you're OK_...breathe with me," he said, as she began to focus on him and take slow, deep breaths.

"My dear, that wasn't nice - are you perhaps polluted by the prejudice the police have spun about us over the years? I assure you, you will see a whole new reality here - _you will be cleansed_.."

Olivia stepped back and looked at him as Elliot's hand fell from her shoulder. Looking around slowly she noticed Emery staring at her, his expression still one of scrutiny rather than anything else.

"I'm sorry...I didn't mean to push you," she said, her voice steadier now that she felt more grounded again.

She could feel Elliot's steady concerned gaze on her, but she resisted the urge to turn and meet his eyes, not wanting to see the concern for her in his eyes which she knew would be there if she turned to look. She couldn't bear it - the knowledge that he was worried about her, trying to work out what was wrong - she was angry at herself for letting him see her crumble.

"What's in your head, pretty lady?" Emery said, stepping closer again, but not touching her this time.

" _I'm fine_...I'm still a bit shaky from the anaesthetic we were..." she paused, her voice reducing to a whisper, "...surprised with."

Olivia felt relieved when the conversation was interrupted by a knock on the door and Robert entered holding a pile of clothes. He placed them on the table and exited quickly, only affording a quick glance at Olivia, who did not return it.

"You both need to change - we do not have anything from the other world here...there are clothes for you both here. We liberated you both of your cell phones. I will give you... _privacy_ to change. I will be back shortly," he said, as he watched them both carefully before turning to leave and closing the door behind him.

Elliot immediately turned to Olivia , and she instantly felt annoyed at herself when she saw the look in his eyes.

"Liv...What happened there ? Are you all right?" he asked, with genuine concern in his voice.

"I'm OK, I'm sorry about that...I don't know what happened...like I said...I'm still having side effects from the anaesthetic," she said, looking away so that she didn't have to look at him as she lied.

She knew he could tell, they had been partners for so many years, that he could tell in a split second that she was not being honest with him, and she dreaded him pushing her to talk about it, she dreaded having to talk to him about it at all.

They both changed quickly, Elliot turning his back but moving between Olivia and the door, to shield her if someone were to enter. Olivia noticed this gesture and felt a warmth at the consideration of his actions.

They quickly changed, their clothes comfortable, casual styles which were shades of blue and grey. Elliot wore a t shirt and trousers, and Olivia a medium length dress which was modest in style. Olivia removed her bracelet and turned to Elliot.

"I need to hide this until we can get it outside. I can't hide it anywhere in this dress," she said.

"I'll hide it," said Elliot as he took it and slipped it into the waistband of his trousers.

"Liv... _where did you go just then_?" he asked softly as he looked at her.

"El...please, we need to focus on this situation," she said dismissively.

"If it affects this situation, then I think we _should_ talk about it," he said, with a more determined edge, hoping that he could push her a little into opening up to him.

"El...he'll be back soon…" she said quietly.

He knew pushing her much further would not do any good - they had little time and the last thing he wanted to do was push her too much and make her lose her focus, but his mind would not rest, not until he had got her to talk to him. He felt a strong sense of unease - he had seen others react in similar ways, and it unsettled him. The thought that she was suffering alone - it both hurt and worried him that she hadn't confided in him.

"It's just you and me here Liv - you know you can talk to me about anything - _don't you_?"

"Yeah...but I don't wanna go there El..." she said, shaking her head and willing the conversation to change direction.

"Maybe you _need_ to go there..." Elliot began, but was stopped by the sounds of the door opening and Emery coming back in.

"Good, you're both ready - come with me" he said, as he stood by the open door and gestured for them to follow him.

Olivia went first and Elliot walked behind her. He watched her cautiously, somewhat happier to see that she was now much more visibly relaxed and focused, but his concern for her had grown. He wanted to put his arms around her, tell her that whatever had happened to her to ignite that kind of reaction, that he would help her, but he feared she would only back away and shut him out further.

As they walked through a door, he immediately snapped out of his thoughts and focused on his surroundings. A narrow metal staircase was in front of them, and they all walked up to another door at the top, which Emery opened with a key.

Olivia, now focused and ready for whatever they might face, glanced at Elliot as they entered.

His concern for her had not abated and he fought the sudden urge to reach out and squeeze her hand, to offer her some reassurance...to offer _himself_ some reassurance that she was OK. He didn't like that she was going into this off kilter, but he liked even less that she was going through something alone. He determined to talk to her as soon as they would not be overheard, and not let her dismiss it this time. She needed to know that he was there for her - lately he had been thinking about need a lot: his need for her to open up to him, and his need for her….her importance in his life was immeasurable _:_

 _Lately, he found himself wanting to reach out and hold her and sometimes when he thought about it, the growing physical need to touch her - it scared him a little..._

He didn't know when he had started to think of his partner in such a preoccupied manner - but she filled his thoughts more and more lately. He watched her as she walked ahead of him into the room and wondered if it would be a bad move to reach for her hand - the very thought was simply comfortable and natural in his mind, but his fear that Olivia might not feel the same prevented him from moving any closer.

Sighing as he regained his own focus, they stepped inside.


	3. Chapter 3

**This chapter is slightly shorter and doesn't have as much interaction between Liv and El, but don't worry, the next chapter makes up for that :-) As always - this is a work of fan fiction and no rights are implied.**

I will aim to update this in a week - the next two chapters are mostly written.

 **CHAPTER 3**

They were ushered quickly through the large room, and both detectives made a point to subtly scan the room, taking in as much detail as they could.

The walls were muted shades of grey and blue, similar to the clothing that they wore. Several people were in the room, all in similar attire, and despite the presence of other people, there was very little noise. Olivia glanced across the room as she passed through, noticing a man talking intently to two children, and a slightly older girl who was reading. Recognising her as the girl who had entered the precinct, Olivia briefly glanced at Elliot. A quick glance was all that they both needed to confirm with each other that they had identified the girl.

Exiting through another door, across the opposite side of the room, they were suddenly met with sunlight.

It took them both a while for their eyes to adjust to the daylight, but they instinctively took in all they could about their surroundings as they followed Emery.

Then they stopped, feeling slightly off guard at the sudden change of location.

"What are we doing out here?" Elliot asked.

Emery stepped closer to them, his hand resting on Olivia's shoulder as he looked up at the sky.

"Look," he said, as Elliot glanced at Olivia, noticing Emery's increasing proximity to her as he stepped even closer, his body almost touching hers.

Elliot did not avert his gaze from Olivia - he knew he had to keep his mind on the case, but the moment Emery invaded her space his focus shifted.

"Look at what?" Olivia replied, as her eyes locked with Elliot's and she let out a slow, controlled breath.

Elliot relaxed a little, seeing that she was maintaining her composure with little effort. Their focus remained on each other - Elliot silently offering her his help should she need it.

Emery remained next to Olivia, his hand grasping her shoulder firmly as he leant down closer to her and spoke in a low voice.

"The air, the sky - the land around us...it is outside of our safe haven...it is all poison...only _inside_ will you be clean..."

Elliot spoke, his words directed to Emery but his eyes still focused on Olivia.

"So what does it take to be part of your haven? How do we get clean?"

Emery straightened, and stepped back from Olivia; his hand leaving her shoulder and running down her arm until he reached her wrist. Elliot followed his movement, tensing as Emery gripped Olivia's wrist and squeezed before letting go and stepping back away from her.

"It's quite simple - you each go to an orientation room and you fast - and think...we relive our hardest memories by repeating the details - down to the minutest detail over and over..until it all becomes...well...just words, it's significance erases from your mind. Then you emerge cleansed and can join our family group," he said, with a slight smile.

Elliot sighed and moved his gaze from Olivia to look at Emery with a questioning glance, "and how long do we fast for?"

"Well, that depends - some transition in days...others longer. The more open you are the quicker the process will be," Emery replied, as he stared hard into Elliot's eyes, stepping closer as he lowered his voice.

 _"You can have so much more than you ever dreamed of."_

Emery turned and opened the door before walking back inside. Elliot and Olivia briefly glanced at each other, Elliot noticing a slight glimmer of thanks in Olivia's eyes, before following him inside.

 **PRECINCT**

"Tell me some good news," Fin said as he entered the squad room and approached Munch.

Munch sat back in his chair and sighed, "I just filled Cragen in - I made contacts, but it will take more than one meeting to get accepted there. They meet weekly, but let's hope we have them both back way before then."

"Did they all seem like regulars?" Fin asked.

"Yes, and there were mutterings about financial contributions - the weekly donations for attendance at the meetings seem exorbitant. They hope that the more they give the more cleansed they will be and the greater the chance will be of meeting their leader," Munch explained.

"They're bleeding them dry - always gotta be money behind these things. How many people were at that meeting?" Fin asked.

"Fifteen - I spoke to three of them at length - the rest were pretty closed off. My friend who got me in - she only went a couple of times - too weird for her...The first one I spoke to was obviously there to draw in newcomers - over friendly, and only too happy to tell me all the wonderful things about their group and how it had changed him," Munch continued.

"What 'wonderful things' did he tell you about, then?" Fin asked.

"Well, they all admire their leader - who most of them have never even met - he's like a celebrity - they all want to meet him, but only those who can commit fully to the ideology can stand a chance of an audience with him," Munch paused, a cautious tone to his voice, "Olivia dated Robert for three months….but she'd only been to one meeting, and they accepted Elliot's presence _very_ easily…"

" _And_ …" Fin asked, not wanting to voice the concern.

"It was _too easy_ ," Cragen said as he approached them, a file in his hand.

"Unfortunately I agree," Munch said. "Why take them straight to where we wanted to go? After speaking to them at that meeting, I can't help but think they got in far too quickly…"

"Everyone at that meeting dreamt of an audience with their leader, but our people went straight in? _What have they walked into_?" Cragen said, and then he handed the file to Fin.

"Robert Larson's file - not much here, well nothing that sticks anyway. Maybe a family member or a friend might know where he would go."

Fin took the file and opened it, getting straight to work looking at Larson's possible connections and family.

"Where the hell are they?" Cragen said, frustrated.

 **UNDISCLOSED LOCATION**

Olivia sat alone in a room against a wall, and stared straight ahead as she tried to focus. She was losing track of time - the lack of daylight made it very hard to tell whether it were night or day, but the lack of food was the real issue.

She leaned her head back against the wall, the nagging headache she had developed was not abating. She didn't know how long they planned to withhold food - she felt lightheaded and shivery, and just needed this to end.

Bringing her knees up, she hugged her arms around them in an effort to keep warm. The room was unheated but not especially cold, but the lack of food was taking its toll considerably now.

At first she had paced the room - checking the door repeatedly in case she could get the lock undone, but she soon realised the necessity in resting. Using her energy too quickly would have only weakened her sooner, and she needed to stay alert and focused. She had tried to conserve her energy, and at first she had coped well, but was now growing lethargic.

She had been taken out of the room twice and escorted to a bathroom where she was only had time to use the toilet and wash her hands before she was escorted back. The same man escorted her both times, waiting outside the door, which had no lock. He said no words to her for the whole duration, and it unsettled her. She might have been there for days, she hoped she had really, because if it had only been one day then she stood no chance of coping with this method of "cleansing."

The second time he had taken her out she had felt dizzy and unsteady, and she made several attempts to get a conversation going but the man remained silent no matter what she said.

Her thoughts drifted to Elliot - she wondered if he were being inadvertently tortured in this manner too. He occupied her thoughts a lot at the moment - in truth, he occupied her thoughts more in general - the passing years had only served to deepen and strengthen their relationship.

It was impossible not to think - there was simply nothing else to do, and so she found that her mind would constantly swing between thoughts of escape and Elliot.

She felt relieved in some way, that they had so far had so little time alone, because she felt it almost a certainty that once they were, he would push her to talk to him. There would be no doubt that he would be thinking about her reaction to Emery - she knew he would help her if she was in a situation she couldn't handle, but she didn't like needing to be helped at all. Letting her composed facade slip was something she feared - she wouldn't let Elliot see that if she could help it.

She sighed and closed her eyes as she leaned her head back against the wall, the cold smooth surface of the floor underneath her hands.

Olivia knew that once they were past this test they would be accepted and far more able to find out exactly what was going on. The technicality of needing to communicate their location was a nagging worry at the back of her mind though, as was the isolation. She wasn't someone who needed to be constantly around other people - she had been alone for a significant part of her life, but this was something else - having so little contact like this was an unsettling isolation, and she found herself wanting to see Elliot again more and more...

The sound of a key turning in the lock broke her train of thought, and she opened her eyes, moving her gaze to the door, watching as Emery walked in, slowly walking toward her, his scrutinizing gaze burning into her as he stopped in front of her, looking down as she stared up.

"Would you like some water Olivia?" he said, staring hard at her.

She simply stared back at him, not answering - their eyes locked, his in apparent interest and hers in defiance, until she eventually laughed.

"What do you think?" she asked, not without a hint of sarcasm..

Olivia knew she shouldn't give him that reaction, but she was growing exhausted and irrational by the minute and playing along with the game was becoming harder and harder.

"Let's talk about it again, Olivia," said Emery as he stared down at her as if studying her under a microscope - she could almost feel him attempting to peel away her layers of emotional protection and see what she kept hidden under the surface.

"I've done what you asked, it means nothing anymore. I have described it over and over and over to you. We've discussed every little detail - i'm sick of talking about it anymore. Doesn't that mean I'm cleansed now?" she said wearily.

"Olivia...to have transitioned, it must have _meant_ something in the first place," he said, his words slow and piercing against her throbbing headache.

"What do you mean?" she said, her heart rate suddenly speeding up at the realisation that he did not believe her fabricated scenario.

"When I met you, in my office...that's what I want to hear about Olivia. _That's what dwells in your head._ You are going to tell me about that - you are going to let me into your head...if you ever want to be free - I am not letting you go back to the poison that is the outside world."

She knew what he was doing - every time she repeated the details of the well rehearsed scenario they had prepared, he repeated it back to her - with subtle parts changed. Only because she and rehearsed and repeated it herself with Elliot and Huang did she notice those details being changed. Huang had briefly warned of it as a technique used by cults to alter memory - to reinvent entire memories and experiences.

As she sat back against the wall again she tried to avert her eyes from his hard gaze, not trusting herself not to antagonise him given how exhausted and irrational she was feeling.

She promised herself that she would _not_ let him in, however hard he pushed her.

Emery squatted down in front of her and stared into her eyes, his face uncomfortably close, giving her no choice but to meet his eyes.

Olivia fought the urge to shove him backward and get up, running out of the room. She knew she wouldn't make it far in her weakening physical state, and she also knew that the girl they had come here to find was somewhere in the same building. She couldn't afford to jeopardise the operation.

"Am I 'cleansed' now?" Olivia said, the sarcasm still evident.

"No Olivia, you clearly are _not_ cleansed." he said, continuing his intent stare, "you need to transition before you can become fully cleansed."

"Of course I do,"she said, the sarcasm now dripping from her voice, against her better instincts, "and are you going to tell me what you mean by that, then?"

"You and Elliot - you are both so alike. He said much the same - except he asked if I was going to tell him or let him starve to death first. Funny, isn't he?"

"I'll die of dehydration much more quickly than starvation you know," she said, ignoring Emery's reference to Elliot despite wanting badly to know how he was, and where he was.

"I would agree with you Olivia, had I not been aware that you had drunk water from the tap in the bathroom," he said, as he raised his hand to her chin and pushed her face up to look at him.

Olivia impulsively raised her hand and slapped his away from her.

Olivia noticed the change in Emery almost immediately but she didn't react fast enough as Emery suddenly grabbed her shoulders and pulled her up until she was standing. He gripped her painfully as he pulled her close to him, but allowed just enough space to meet her eyes.

Olivia felt her breath quickening as his hold on her shoulders became bruisingly hard, and he stared into her eyes. She knew he wanted to incite a reaction from her, and she was determined not to give him what he wanted. She battled to retain her composure but she could feel it rapidly falling away.

"Olivia," he began, his voice low and steady, "I am going to get inside your head," his grip tightened as he stared hard into her eyes, "into your heart, _in_ to _you_. I know why you are really here, why do you think I let you in so easily? You and your partner's conversions will be my triumph. You belong to me now, and you _will_ show gratitude."

"Does everyone here show you their 'gratitude'?" she responded, silently relieved to hear how calm she sounded.

"Oh yes, Olivia," he said, as he released his hold on her right shoulder, running his hand slowly across to her neck, "I am freedom. I am enlightenment."

Olivia tensed as his hand moved lower down, neither of them breaking eye contact. As soon as his hand inched further down, quickly and roughly grabbing at her breast, she could not stop her reaction as she pushed hard against his chest knocking him slightly off balance. Immediately she brought her leg up moving it sharply up into his groin.

Emery doubled over in pain and Olivia shoved him hard and moved quickly around him, a wave of dizziness striking her hard and she wavered momentarily before making her move.

Suddenly struck with the unsettling realisation that she had no plan, no means of contact and no idea where her partner was she turned and ran out of the door.

"Get back in here!" he shouted angrily, "You're gonna pay dearly for that!"

 **Next chapter we catch up with Elliot and find out what happens to Liv. I will try to update it over the weekend, so just two or three days.**


	4. Chapter 4

**I would suggest watching Undercover before this chapter as there is a conversation relating to it, but if you don't have it to hand, track down a recap on-line as it might be useful.**

 **Thank you to everyone who is reading, reviewing and following. It's so great to be able to get these plot bunnies out of my head and to share them with Liv and El fans :-) Things wont be easy for Liv and El in the next two chapters, but it'll all work itself out - don't worry because I love these two!**

Elliot had spent an unfathomable length of time doing nothing at all except grow hungry and tired. He was pissed off - they were falling too easily into traps that they should have been able to anticipate, but what pissed him off the most was the separation from Olivia. Not knowing exactly how long he had been locked in the room he was imprisoned in, and not knowing exactly what was happening to her. That fact bothered him the most - with an escalating intensity that began to consume his thoughts. He needed to get out of here and find her, he needed to know that she was OK.

He had little to do but think, and Olivia's reaction when Emery had got too close worried him. He couldn't shake the unnerving feeling that he had seen that response before - too many times, _in victims_. He needed to see her, needed to get her to talk to him, because not knowing what she was going through - in her physical absence from him at that moment, or what she was trying to deal with without letting him in - _it was too much_. He had to tell her that she needed to let him in - needed to talk to him, and he didn't understand why she felt she had to shut him out when she was so clearly hurting.

Emery had entered four times - Elliot couldn't be sure if this was once a day or maybe twice a day - with no windows and no other indications of the passing of time, he only had his gnawing hunger to go by. Each time Emery had entered he had sat down in front of him and stared with a scrutinizing curiosity as he asked Elliot to repeat the details of the traumatic event that had led him there. Elliot tried hard to stick to the story, but after repeating it over and over again, and being asked to describe details repeatedly - he was beginning to forget the scenario they had agreed...

The next time that Emery entered, Elliot was calm but cautious as he watched him carrying a cup, walk over and place it down in front of him.

"Water?" Emery offered.

"Just water, or are you gonna drug me again?" he replied sardonically.

"Just water, I assure you," Emery said as he offered it to him.

Elliot took the cup and glanced and the clear liquid it contained before putting the cup to his dry lips and drinking it quickly. He knew it would be better to sip it slowly, but he was too thirsty to bother.

"Let's start," Emery said.

"Tell me again, _why_ we are doing this? Over and over - the same words?" Elliot asked.

"The more you relive a trauma, describing it down to details you couldn't even recall - the more it becomes meaningless, and you are free from it."

"How can I describe details I can't recall?" Elliot said.

"I can help you reach inside your mind and see anything," Emery said.

"Right...anything _you want me_ to see?"

"Only what needs to be seen."

Elliot sighed. He knew Emery was trying to plant things in his mind - change his memories by confusing and changing the way he remembered it. It was a technique that would have been causing confusion by now had Elliot's fabricated scenario actually been real.

Eliot was tired of playing the game now. This time he remembered which small details Emery was trying to change - it was subtle, but he picked up on it quickly. He would ask him to describe everything about the surroundings,; the colours of cars, what he was wearing, the colour of Olivia's shirt, and the sound of a dog barking after the gun shots had silenced. Elliot realised which details Emery was trying to change and gave him what he wanted, repeating the story back to him, with the changed details put in. Emery had seemed pleased and left soon after, happy with his apparent progress in altering Elliot's memory.

Elliot rested his head back against the wall and sighed in frustration - he was playing the game and convincing Emery that he was letting him alter his thoughts and memories, but with no food and little water, he didn't know how long he could keep the charade up.

 **PRECINCT**

Cragen had invited Munch and Fin to join him with the agents from the FBI who had arrived the day before. While waiting for the agents to join them, they convened in an interview room - sitting around a table. Cragen observed the others - he was sure he looked as tired as they did - none of them had left the precinct other than to pick up food in the past four days, taking turns sleeping in the cribs. He was deeply concerned - the operation had gone very wrong, very quickly, and he needed his detectives pulled out fast - _he would just have to find them first._

Cragen gestured to the two remaining chairs as the agents entered and sat down. After brief introductions they quickly began.

"OK people, we are all well aware the situation. We have had no contact from either Detective Benson or Detective Stabler since we lost their signal - that was four days ago - Detective Munch," he said, gesturing toward John, "has attended a meeting, but it's ground level infiltration - we don't know how long it could take him to get trusted enough by these people to get anything useful."

"We are trying to locate where Olivia's contact was staying. She had been seeing him for three months, so he must have stayed somewhere within a reasonable distance from here. We've checked her email account but there are very few personal emails. We have her home computer in TARU now," Munch said.

"What about cell phones?" Cragen asked. "Where are we on that?"

"She has two," Fin said, looking toward the FBI agents, "one work and one personal - both are being checked along with her computer. If there's any communication between them that could indicate where he might have taken them, our guys will find it."

"A search had been conducted of Detective Benson's apartment - there are no other leads there, so her computer and cell phone are all we can go on right now. She was quite thorough in updating me with everything she knew about them, so unfortunately I don't think she would have missed anything. Detective Stabler had no prior connection to Robert Larson or the group," said Cragen.

An hour later, and the FBI had left to retrace the route their van took to try to determine the point that the signal had been lost. The squad room was quieter now, while Fin and Munch were sitting at their desks reading through print outs of Oliva's emails. Cragen sat at his desk, watching them from across the room - he knew they couldn't all keep going with so little sleep, but he knew also that suggesting either of them go home to get some proper rest would be futile. His team were a family - and despite any issues that Fin and Elliot had over the years, Fin was working just as hard to trace him as he was Olivia. None of them would rest until Elliot and Olivia were home.

 **SANCTUM RETREAT - TWO DAYS LATER**

Elliot opened his eyes, aware from the stiffness in his joints that he had fallen asleep sitting against the wall on the hard floor. He felt as though he could sleep for days and days, and that thought awakened him when he started to wonder what could have roused him when he felt so exhausted.

Hearing raised voices outside the door, he got to his feet as quickly as possible, hoping for an attempt to get through the door, sick of playing the game anymore. The hunger was oddly wearing off now, but the slight dehydration battled against him, as he placed a hand on the wall to steady himself.

The door was quickly pulled open and Emery and another man entered. Elliot's heart dropped at the sight before him. They half dragged Olivia in through the door with them - each man had a tight hold on her upper arms and Emery roughly pulled her from the other man's grasp, nodding at him. He nodded back and left, but remained standing outside the door.

"I knew you were here to dig for dirt on my utopia, I intended to convert you both - I offered Olivia the chance to transcend but she chose to resist."

He tightened his grip on her arms, as she remained still, her face turned away from Elliot's worried gaze, and her long hair falling forward, as her head slightly slumped.

"Liv, are you alright?" Elliot said, his voice immediately taking a panicked tone that he could not hide.

As Elliot stepped toward her, Emery gripped her harder and threw her with force against him, knocking him down as her body hit him hard, taking them both down.

Elliot rolled her gently onto her back as she moaned slightly, her eyes closed as they brimmed with tears. Smoothing her damp hair away from her face gently he immediately noticed bruises scattered across her face, arms and neck. His anger at her condition rose quickly, as he stood.

"What the hell did you do to her you son of a bitch?" Elliot shouted.

"Calm down Elliot," smiled Emery. "You've been doing so well, you can both still have a life here - but you need to decide whether you are going to be honest with me now. _I know why you two are really here,"_ he paused, his voice lowering, "I could just end you both - but I thought it would be far more fun to change you - watch you transcend - to take you into our family here."

He stepped closer as he stared down at them, "you will be evidence of my greatness."

As Elliot stood quickly and lunged toward him, Emery walked around him and Elliot froze as he pulled out Olivia's bracelet from his pocket, holding it up and dangling in front of Elliot's eyes.

"GPS? Ingenious, disguising it this way...but I wonder if this is all you have... _your only link to the outside world_?" he laughed as he dropped it to the floor, stamping on it.

Elliot stared at the crushed bracelet on the floor, in his peripheral vision he was aware of Olivia, lying on the ground. He felt a sudden pang of despair as his mind raced with the possibilities: if the squad couldn't track them down…

"I will leave you two alone for now - _to get reaquainted_ , tomorrow you can sleep with the others. You'll be more comfortable there, and you can both begin to integrate into our daily life here. You will be closely supervised at first however - you are still contaminated from the outside world, and I cannot risk either of you influencing any of my people here. Olivia won't try to escape again, _I assure you of that_ \- I suggest you don't either, because if you do it will be her who pays for it, not you," he paused, a sadistic smile forming, " _I have a feeling that could be quite an effective threat_."

He left the room, closing the door and Elliot turned immediately to Olivia, dropping to the ground beside her as he slipped an arm under her shoulders, lifting her slightly so that he could pull her into his arms.

"Liv, are you OK?" he whispered. His heart thudded hard and fast as he held her close to him, looking at her face. She opened her eyes, not meeting his as she struggled to sit up.

"Woah Liv, slow down, don't try to get up yet - _talk to me, please_. What have they done to you? What happened?" he said, a hint of panic rising into his voice as he stroked her hair.

"It's OK, El," Olivia began, pausing to take a deep, shuddering breath and attempting to prevent her tears from spilling.

"I spoke to the girl - her name is Rachel..." she paused, taking another breath. "Rachel Ash. She's fifteen and she's been here for six months - she wants our help, she's been assaulted more times than she can remember and raped three times. We have to find a way to contact Cragen - without the transmitter how are they going to find us, El?"

Elliot held her tightly and placed a kiss on her head. She momentarily closed her eyes - the unfamiliarity of Elliot's lips against her felt comforting and right. She welcomed it, and wondered if she was thinking rationally anymore when she wished he would do it again.

"They made us from the start - thankfully he is too much of an egotistical head case to just kill us. He wants us alive - but Liv, right now all I'm concerned about is _you,_ baby."

Olivia felt a tear slide down her cheek and she returned Elliots embrace, one arm around his side and the other resting on his chest. She knew that his use of such an endearment was a first for them, but she had no drive to question it. She ached and her head pounded, but Elliot's affection was the only comfort - the only warmth she had felt in what seemed like weeks. The passing of time was confusing, and the isolation hard to bear, and now that she was with Elliot, she wanted desperately to stay with him and not to be alone.

"I'm OK. What about you?" she said quietly.

"Liv _please_ , I need you to talk to me. How badly are you hurt?" he asked with growing concern.

"They just roughed me up a bit El, I'll be fine. It's nothing I can't handle."

"Liv, this is more than 'roughing you up a bit'," he stated with anger before his voice dropped to a whisper. "let me check you over... _Let me help you Liv_?" he asked, with an almost pleading tone.

Olivia nodded reluctantly, and allowed Elliot to gently place her back on the ground as he turned her face from side to side carefully inspecting her injuries. The large bruise on her cheekbone made him flinch as he gently pressed the undamaged skin around it.

"This looks like a fracture," he said softly, as he began inspecting her other visible injuries. The anger bubbled inside him as he surveyed her injuries - he was certain she had at least two fractures but the rest was mainly bruising. He couldn't be sure though, all he really had to go on were his observations of Melinda as she described injuries. Aware that he had only seen injuries which were visible he began to carefully pull her top up. He stopped immediately as Olivia put her hand on his, halting his movements.

" _Don't,"_ she whispered.

"Liv...let me see - let me help you," Elliot said, his voice thick with concern.

"I'm OK, just let me rest El."

Elliot looked at her, the concern so obvious that Olivia felt almost annoyed at herself for not not managing to hide her injuries and avoid eliciting that response from him. His concern was touching, but she hated that she had caused it.

Her heart warmed as his hand touched her uninjured cheek gently.

"Some of these bruises are fresher than others...Christ Liv, they really worked you over, and more than once. _I'm gonna kill that son of a bitch!_ " He carefully reached under and around her, scooping her into his arms and pulling her on to his lap.

Olivia didn't object, or even question the sudden closeness he had initiated. She was just so relieved to see him, that it felt right to be held by him in this way. She felt tired - _so tired_ , and resting her head against him felt so natural. She almost felt as though she fit perfectly with him - as if their bodies moulded to each other.

"I feel so cold all the time," she said as she leant against him.

"It's the lack of food - I've done plenty of endurance training in the past, but not having food means not having energy, and that's another thing entirely. The bastard is supplying just enough water to keep us going. He knows what he's doing - he's trying to push us to our limits, make us desperate," Elliot said as he tightened his hold on Olivia, hoping to share some warmth with her, although in truth he felt cold too.

"Talk to me Liv, please - I have no idea how long I've been in this room, or how long they had you out there. What did they do? _Liv, please tell me_!"

Olivia rested her head against Elliot's chest and paused, letting her breathing slow and calm to a steady rate - she moved her arm across his chest, the feel of Elliot's heartbeat against her hand was reassuring and comforting. She was aware through the mass of aches and pains that she felt, that this was the longest they had ever been this physically close before. She wondered if he realised that too - and allowed herself to relax into his hold as she spoke.

"I was stupid - I didn't even know the layout and I tried to run - Emery and one of the others caught up with me pretty quickly. The other one grabbed me, and I fought him but I just didn't have the energy, Emery punched me in my stomach and I just didn't have the strength to fight," She paused, as she realised how tense Elliot had become.

"Liv... _did he_?" Elliot began, his voice cracking with fear as he failed to finish his sentence.

" _No_." Olivia whispered, feeling Elliot relax slightly. "Emery had his hands all over me, and graphically described what he could to me if he wanted to," she said with disgust. "He assured me he would 'have me before long', but he was more interested in teaching me a lesson. He laid into me then threw me back into the room he had me in before. He sent one of the others in to push me around - it was nothing I couldn't handle. This time they wouldn't let me out to use the bathroom though- but thankfully I'm too dehydrated to give him the satisfaction of watching me suffer in that way, so it didn't matter much. I met Rachel when she came in to give me water - I think twice, maybe three times."

Elliot began stroking her hair slowly, Olivia closing her eyes at the comforting gesture as the feel of his hand warmed her.

" _I'll kill that son of a bitch if he puts his hands on you again,"_ he said, before dropping his voice to a whisper. " _How badly did he hurt you?"_

"He punched and slapped me and shouted a lot - the other one kicked me a few times - really El, I'm not gonna describe every detail. _I'm OK_." she sighed.

"I just hate that I wasn't there to help you. Do you think you have any serious injuries? If we find a way out of here, can you make it?"

"Yeah, I'm fine - I just need to rest - if we play their game - play along with them, we can at least eat and drink - neither of us are gonna get far if they keep weakening us like this," she said.

"OK Liv, we play along - but I can only do that to a point - i'm not gonna let anyone hurt you again. I…. _care about you too much_ to let that bastard get his hands on you again."

"The whole memory reinvention thing - he knew the scenario we came in with was false - he wanted the truth from me, my darkest memory - he kept digging, and pushing, wanting to get in my head... _when we met him._..he kept saying I had to let him take me back to that moment."

She pulled out of Elliot's arms and sat back on the ground, the movement causing her to shift uncomfortably as she settled on the ground, turning to face him.

"I didn't tell him..why I reacted that way...I made up a story... _he doesn't get to do that to me_."

"Liv...what happened there? Has that happened before?"

" _Yeah_." Olivia took a deep breath, releasing it slowly as she looked into his eyes, the concern and care emanating from his gaze warming her.

"When did that start?" he asked softly.

Olivia couldn't hold his gaze as her eyes moved to focus on the wall next to him.

" _Since..Sealview_ ," she whispered.

Elliot closed his eyes momentarily before opening them and watching her - afraid to ask, but equally as afraid that she would not answer, and leave him to torture himself with the possibilities that would continue to run through his head.

"Liv, tell me what happened. You _can_ talk to me - I want to help you," he said with sincerity.

Olivia remained still as she spoke, not moving her eyes from the spot on the wall she was firmly fixed on.

Elliot watched her, tensing as she began to speak, related the details of her attack, but not letting his emotions spill out. he didn't interrupt her, despite wanting to react several times. He had spent so long wanting to know, but so long afraid of what he might hear. He was afraid she would shut down at any moment - her honesty was so real and her experience still so raw.

He listened silently as she described her attack to him - all he wanted to do as she spoke was reach out and take her into his arms, but he was afraid that anything he said or did, any movement might break the moment, and see her retreat and shut down again. He couldn't bear it if she shut him out again - he just wanted to help her, to hold her...he wanted to hold her so much it was becoming almost impossible not to, but he fought it, allowing her the space and the time she needed to open up to him.

And then, when she was finished, he reached out and put a hand on her shoulder gently.

"Liv, i'm so sorry I wasn't there - I wish you had talked to me - _you didn't have to carry that alone_ ," he said softly.

Olivia looked down at the ground between them, she shook her head slightly as she struggled to find the words.

"I didn't want you to see me like that," she said quietly.

"Like what?" Elliot asked.

" _A victim_ …" she whispered. "Not strong enough to stop that from happening," she paused, fighting with herself, her voice wavering as she continued, "if Fin hadn't got there when he did…." Olivia looked up, her heart racing as she forced herself to make eye contact with Elliot, afraid of what she would see.

She immediately sighed, relieved when she saw no judgement, disappointment or questioning...then she wondered why she had ever been afraid to open up to him in the first place.

"He was armed and you weren't Liv, it's not about being strong enough - anyone can have the upper hand if they have a weapon - he couldn't overpower you without restraining you..." He hesitated before bringing his other hand up to wipe away a tear which fell slowly down her face, before resting his palm against her cheek. Olivia instinctively leant her face slightly against the warmth of his hand, not breaking eye contact as she continued:

"His memory alteration seemed almost appealing at one point, the thought that it would become meaningless, but I won't let him in - I won't let someone I don't trust into my head, to twist something like that….. I want it out of my head," she said, before dropping her voice to a whisper, " _It haunts me, El_!"

Elliot pulled her into his arms carefully embracing her, aware that she was injured, but needing to hold her as much as she needed to be held. He felt her relax into his hold and closed his eyes as he felt her hair against his cheek...her face against his shoulder, her hands around his back as she returned his embrace.

"I swear to you Liv, I will always be here for you," he said softly. "I should have been there, I should have been the one watching your back."

"Fin did everything he could El, he stopped it from getting any further. I hate though...I hate that I needed someone to do that - that I couldn't stop it myself."

Elliot took a deep breath, releasing it slowly as he leant back against the wall, creating enough distance between them that he could still hold her, but also look at her.

Olivia frowned slightly in confusion as his expression changed slightly - she couldn't decipher it, and it bothered her.

"What's wrong?" she said quietly.

"You...you are so important to me Liv. _Do you know what you mean to me_?" he said with sincerity as he looked into her eyes.

Feeling uncomfortable, Olivia turned her head away, but Elliot had said too much to stop now. He slid his hand from her cheek and gently placed it under her chin, turning her face back toward him. She met his eyes with a questioning, uncertain look.

"What do I mean to you?" she whispered, a tear spilling as anxiety over Elliot's sudden honestly took hold.

"You mean _everything_ to me...we're gonna get out of this, I don't know how right now, but we are. When he brought you in here - all I could think was...if you're hurt too badly...if we don't get out of here...then I'm the biggest idiot in the world because in all these years, in all this time we've spent together...you hold this important... _vital_ …. place in my life... _in my heart_ , and I have never told you…." he paused, his voice unsteady as he allowed himself to let go, and give her his total honesty. "... _that I love you_."

He took a shaky breath, realising that he was trembling slightly with the out pour of years of pent up honesty, " _I'm in love with you, and I need you to know that Liv_ ," he whispered.

Elliot felt relieved that she hadn't moved away - hadn't created any physical space between them, but he couldn't read the expression in her eyes. She was processing what he had said and he realised he had bombarded her. After her sharing what she had with him, maybe it was the wrong time..or the perfect time, he didn't know if he had just screwed up majorly, or done something he should have done years ago.

"El..." Liv said, her voice softening as she smiled slightly, but soon winced at the pain in her cheekbone.

"Are you...?" Elliot began.

"I'm OK El, just listen."

Elliot sat back slightly, almost physically bracing himself for her rejection, but unwilling to believe totally that she would react so negatively to his admission. He dropped one hand to his lap, the other resting lightly on her shoulder.

Olivia looked into his eyes - his honesty was so clear that she wondered how she never allowed herself to really look before, and see the depth of feeling that he kept hidden.

"You're in love with me, El?" she asked, her voice soft and quiet and slightly disbelieving.

"Yeah." Elliot said, as a nervous sigh escaped him, "I need you to know that…Liv, I want to be here for you - I want to help you..." he said matching her tone.

"El, I don't..."

"Need help, yeah I know, Liv... _except you do_. You need to not be dealing with what you went through alone. Let me be here for you…" he paused, the emotion now undeniable in his voice, " _please, just let me in_."

 **How will Olivia react to Elliot's words? Now that she knows he loves her - what will she say? Does she feel the same?**


	5. Chapter 5

**Thank you to everyone reading :-) Apologies for the delay posting this chapter! I am prioritising this story, as it's a lot further a long than my others and I know how frustrating delays in updates can be! Also in progress is Distance - a T rated EO story, and I have put Trust back in progress - an M rated one shot which I will continue as a series of M rate EO one shots :-)**

Olivia couldn't force herself to look away however hard she tried, the strength of the love he felt held her in his gaze. She hurt, her pain was physical and her body ached, but her feelings of regret and shame hurt her in a whole different way. Her fear though - that was evaporating rapidly as his love and honesty seeped into her heart. Her pain wasn't something she had to hide from him, _not when he loved her_ \- not when he wanted to be there for her - no one else had ever come close to making her feel so loved as he did at that moment.

She wanted to kiss him right then - the impulse grew suddenly strong and she didn't want to battle it. She raised her hand to his cheek as he had done to her and leant slightly closer, ignoring the pain that urged her to stop - to sit still and rest. Her hand felt warm against his skin. She moved closer still, her eyes dropping momentarily to his mouth as she felt an almost overwhelming desire to press her lips against his - to feel that seemingly forbidden connection between them that they both fought so well.

Elliot's breath quickened in response to their close proximity. He had never been in such an intimate moment with Olivia before. He wanted desperately to close the gap between them, but given what she had shared with him, and knowing that she was struggling with flashbacks, he needed her to be the one to make that move. Her hand against his cheek was soft and warm - his heart soared with a hope that perhaps she felt something for him too.

"El…" she began, her voice breathy and soft.

Elliot leant forward and placed a light kiss on her forehead, wanting to do so much more, knowing that circumstances would not allow for that, but also silently urging her to let her restraint slip and just kiss him.

Olivia closed her eyes and gasped slightly - the feel of his lips touching her, however briefly, filled her with a need for him. Her heart thudded with anticipation while she opened her eyes to look at him. He moved back slightly, and she realised that she should have said something by now - knowing that he was processing her reaction and wondering if she felt the same...

Olivia took a deep breath and pulled his face close toward her, pressing her lips lightly against his.

The delicate touch of her lips sent waves of desire through him - he responded softly, wanting to take her in his arms and kiss her passionately but using all his restraint to respond with a softer tenderness than he wanted to - he needed her to show him what she was comfortable with.

Olivia opened her mouth slightly, and Elliot gave a small moan as he felt her tongue touch lightly against his lips. Opening his mouth he felt alive and full of passion as her tongue slipped into his mouth, finding his. She kissed him softly and cautiously at first, but quickly building in passion until they were kissing deeply and intimately. Elliot wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close to him, the feel of her in his arms was amazing. He gently ran his hands across her sides and back being careful not to hurt her given the bruises he had seen - he was sure she had more that she had not shown him.

Olivia jumped back suddenly as a noise at the door caused them both to turn, but Elliot's hand remained lightly on her arm, not wanting to break their physical contact completely.

The door opened and Robert quickly entered the room, closing it behind him. He paused, his eyes falling on them - their physical closeness not going unnoticed.

"Did I interrupt something?"

Elliot gently moved Olivia so that she was sitting with her back to the wall, before standing and turning toward Robert.

"Do you have anything to do with this?" he asked, his voice thick with anger and accusation.

"To do with what?" Robert said, as he stepped closer, stopping inches from Elliot as the two men stared hard at each other.

"Robert didn't touch me, he wasn't even there." Olivia said, her voice shaking as she leant her head back against the wall, trying to shift her increasing headache.

Robert stepped back, his eyes falling from Elliot's and toward Olivia.

"What happened?" he asked, his voice suddenly filled with concern.

"Your messed up 'family' that you wanted to drag Olivia into beat the hell out of her." Elliot said, stepping closer to Olivia, not liking Robert in closer proximity to her, but realising that he may have just discovered a way out of the room.

"Shit. Olivia, are you OK?" I didn't want you to get hurt - I love you, baby." Robert said, as he crouched down next to her, taking her hand in his.

Elliot tensed, wanting to drag Robert off of her, but he met her eyes for a brief second, and they both knew how they would play this.

"Then help me, Robert - I'm scared - you have to get us out of here." Olivia said, looking into Robert's eyes and doing her best to get him on her side.

"Why are you here? Does Emery know?" Elliot said, as he stepped closer, "aren't you taking a big risk?"

"Yes...but the tracking device they found - it panicked him - they are talking about moving out...Olivia...they aren't planning on taking you unless you can really convince them you can be trusted."

"So, they leave us...or they kill us, which is it?" Olivia asked, knowing the answer.

Robert sighed, "Emery inducts the women a certain way - I didn't know, I swear to God Olivia, I _swear_ I didn't know - the girl you were talking to, Rachel.. _I was watching you,_ I heard her tell you how Emery kept her prisoner, how he and the others abused her constantly, and raped her - I love you - I don't want that to happen to you!"

"Then don't let it happen, help her." Elliot said.

"But how do I stop that?"

"How do we get out of here? " Elliot asked.

"It's a bunker - they expanded it, to turn it into a huge safehouse. There's only one door to the ground level, you can't get out of this part without going through there." Robert said.

"He said he'd let us out of this room tomorrow." Olivia said, wincing and shifting uncomfortably against the wall.

Elliot's eyes flashed briefly with concern, but he stayed focused, concentrating on their only lead in escaping.

"He is placating you - he isn't going to risk mixing you with the others so soon - they all worship him - even the kids."

"Robert..." Olivia began, a look of genuine sadness in her eyes, " those kids are so young, _please_ , help us to get them away from here. If he's already hurt them, at least you can help to stop it now."

"OK," Robert said, "tell me what to do."

"If we get out of here, are there any towns nearby?" Elliot asked.

"No, its pretty isolated - a lot of farm land but no houses for at least a twenty minute drive as far as I know. If you tried to get out alone you would be on an isolated quiet route - pure luck if a car came by here." Robert said.

"We have to get in contact with our people, Robert. If they move on, then Rachel and those other kids won't stand a chance. Can you get to a phone? We both had cell phones when we got into that truck, you were there, what did they do with them?" Elliot asked.

"We smashed them...I'm sorry, I just did what I was told to….but...Emery has _my_ phone..I gave it to him when we brought you in - we hand over everything from the outside world. We take turns..well the men do, going out for months at a time - that's our job as outreachers. We introduce people to our meetings, get them involved, help our organisation grow. I have taken my phone both times and handed it back in when I have returned."

"You've left twice? "How long have you been part of this Robert?" Olivia asked.

"Two years...but we had three retreats then - now there is just this one, the others were too exposed, too easy to find and outsiders protested against our alternative way of life. It's been good to me - it's not all bad. The women here are shared - but I rarely indulge - I swear to you, I have never done anything to anyone who was unwilling."

Elliot sighed inwardly, wanting to slam Robert against the wall and tell him just what he thought of him for his 'rare indulgence', but he worked to maintain his composure.

"We believe you Robert - Olivia trusts you and that's enough for me... listen, there could be a few cellphones up there...distract him, leave this door unlocked, and we can look. First though, get us some water - we are both getting pretty dehydrated Robert - Olivia isn't gonna make it out of here otherwise - she's going to get dangerously dehydrated, she hasn't had any water in a while - that's far more dangerous than anything else right now." Elliot said.

Robert hesitated, "OK...look, I slipped away from the group meeting - everyone goes...If I spend too long away - someone will notice. Emery meditates before the meetings, he goes off somewhere to do that, he isn't back yet... I can go and get some water, there's a drinking fountain in the hall - I'll be back in a minute."

As Robert turned and left, quietly closing the door behind him, Elliot returned to Olivia's side, crouching down next to her as he gently stroked her hair.

"Liv, you look pale - tell me how you're feeling…"

"I'm fine, it's just the combination of no food and water, and those sons of bitches getting hold of me," she said quietly, the exhaustion quite plain.

Elliot sat down next to her and put his arm around her, pulling her closer to him as kissed her lightly on her head. Olivia gave a small smile, wishing they were anywhere else so that she could continue the kiss she had instigated. Closing her eyes, she sighed.

"You OK Liv?" he whispered.

Olivia turned her head towards him, but remained leaning back against the wall.

"I'm OK….my head is pounding, but now Robert is on our side we stand a chance," she said, smiling weakly, "El," she continued taking hold of his hand, "when we get out of here..."

Elliot dropped his arm away from Olivia's shoulders and shuffled back a little as the sound of a key in the door interrupted their conversation. The last thing he felt like doing was letting her go, he wanted to hold her, keep her safe - keep her away from the man who had brought her into this mess in the first place, but he knew they needed him, and because of that, he didn't want to antagonise or push Robert away by putting his own feelings for Olivia too clearly on display.

"OK, he's still out and the others are in the hall," said Robert hurriedly as he handed them both a bottle of water.

"The hall?" Elliot asked.

"The big room upstairs - he is coming back soon, but you have some time to get to his office." he paused as he focused on Olivia as she drank slowly from the bottle. "He really hurt that girl, Rachel...I can't say I haven't...ever taken advantage of the different morals we have here, but the kids...I could never...you know that's not the kind of man I am Olivia, don't you?" he said, looking at her anxiously.

"I know Robert...I know you wouldn't hurt those kids...that's why you have to do everything you can to help us right now, " Olivia said.

Robert relaxed a little as he walked over, leaning down and holding out his hands. Olivia shifted uncomfortably, and took his hands as he helped her stand. Elliot seethed as he watched Robert support her as they walked to the door. He wanted nothing more than to wrench the creeps hands from her and help her himself, but he knew how important it was to use Robert to their advantage.

Elliot frowned as he watched Olivia walking with obvious discomfort. She appeared to be struggling and in pain and a ball of anxiety grew in him as he watched her - not knowing how much was an act for Robert's sake, or how badly she was genuinely hurt.

"You understand now, don't you?" Robert said, stepping closer still to Olivia, "You seemed disgusted - you understand though...that I have had sex with... _younger women_...but _not_ kids Olivia...and I never harmed them...that's not who I am."

Olivia looked at him and did her best to smile, everything in her wanted to tell him how much damage he had done - that not using physical force still made it rape - her brief conversation with Rachel had enlightened her to the depraved attitudes of the men in the group. Robert hadn't physically hurt Rachel, but she complied through fear after Emery and others had.

She wished she was having this conversation in an interrogation room, where she could at the very least have him on statutory rape and accessory charges, but playing along with him for now was her best move.

"I know Robert - I know what kind of a man you are." Olivia said.

Elliot walked closely behind them, while Robert put his arm around her and supported her as they walked down the corridor. Elliot grew more concerned as they made their way up the steps. Olivia took the steps slowly, leaning heavily on Robert and he couldn't help but feel a stab of anger. If Olivia was hurt, _he_ should be the one helping her, _not_ this deluded creep.

Once up the steps they entered the main hall and Robert took a step back, watching intently as Olivia steadied herself on the wall. Elliot fought the urge to reach out to her, and take her arm - he knew she would not welcome the attention.

"We gotta get outside after we've searched the office - how do we unlock the main door?" Elliot asked.

"There's a cabinet with keys in, it's under his desk - a bigger key than the others, different kind of lock, I noticed it when he left."

"That's really helpful Robert." Olivia said, with as much warmth as she could feign.

"OK, I gotta go - when you get out...make sure she gets to a doctor..." he said, looking at Elliot intently.

"Of course, she's my partner, I'll take care of her." Elliot replied.

"Olivia..." Robert began, stepping closer and running a hand through her hair, "I love you."

Elliot tensed, a barely contained rage building inside him, as Robert tilted Olivia's head toward him and closed the distance between them, leaning in and kissing her, closing his eyes. Olivia returned his kiss but kept her eyes open, as she focused on Elliot. Her eyes locked with Elliot's as Robert deepened their kiss, and Olivia reciprocated. Elliot couldn't look away - despite the mess of emotion which threatened to spill over at any moment. He couldn't stand to see this guys hands on her, his tongue slipping into her mouth - Olivia's responses only made the scene more torturous for him, yet he did not divert his eyes from hers for a single moment.

Robert reached down and took Olivia's hand, pressing a key into her palm as he broke his kiss. She smiled and mouthed her thanks silently.

Elliot still didn't relax as Robert pulled away, the physical distance not enough now that the image of her kissing another man was burned into his mind. He knew it was necessary - that she felt nothing for Robert, that despite Robert's professions of love it was not reciprocated - but he just wanted to put his own hands on her, capture her lips with his, taste her, hold her.. _.love_ her. Now that he had shared an intimate kiss with her, he knew he would never be able to go back - they had crossed a line that changed everything - and he welcomed it completely.

Elliot took her arm lightly, glad when she accepted his help, as they walked towards the office, quickly sliding the key into the lock and turning it.

Once inside he closed the door and visually scanned the room, debating where to begin.

"I'll check the desk," Olivia said as she began walking towards the other end of the small room. Wincing in pain she reached the desk and placed her hands on the surface, bending forward to lean against it.

Elliot glanced up and frowned as his eyes fell on her, realising immediately that her physical condition was more than an act as she leaned heavily against the desk.

"Liv," he said quietly as he moved over to her, placing a hand on her upper arm.

Olivia turned her head to look at him but continued leaning on the desk.

"I'm OK," she told him as she stood up and moved around behind the desk sitting in the chair.

"Like hell you are!" Elliot said.

"We dont have time for this, start searching El," she said quickly, clearly annoyed to be the focus of his concern when they could little afford a distraction.

Elliot sighed and turned his attention to the room. He knew that she was right - they had to be quick, but his concern for her engulfed him; he had to know how badly she was hurt.

Olivia quickly produced the small key box from under the desk and began looking for the right one as Elliot searched the rest of the room.

"You gonna be OK to run if we need to?" Elliot asked, his voice thick with concern.

"I'll do what I have to, don't worry," she said dismissively.

"OK," Elliot sighed. "Just..."

"What is it?" Olivia asked softly, looking up at him.

Elliot didn't reply, unsure of his words - he had told Olivia how he felt but she hadn't said the same to him. His mind battled with his emotions - his love for her was too encompassing to ignore anymore, but he also wondered whether he would come to regret telling her. She had kissed him, but she had not confessed to the same depth of feeling that he had. It bothered him, and he needed to know how she felt - he made himself a promise to sit down and talk to her once they were out of danger...

Olivia paused briefly, and when it became clear that Elliot was not going to continue, she resumed her search of the desk, pulling out a small bundle of phones and placing them on the desk.

"This one is Robert's. Don't know how long the other ones have been here," she said, as she pressed the power button, and waited, "this one has to be the best bet."

Elliot walked across the room and round the desk, as she rummaged through the key box, pulling one out before she rose carefully, holding the key in her hand.

"Got it," she said, holding up a larger, silver plated key.

Elliot responded only in action - slipping a hand around the back of her neck and gently pulling her closer as he leaned in and kissed her. His kiss was unexpected, slow and tender, and Olivia closed her eyes, melting into his hold.

He pulled away to look at her, his hand caressing her hair. "Let's get out of here and pick up where we left off…. _I love you_."

The phone beeped and Olivia glanced at it. Elliot inwardly cursed at the interruption, he needed to have this conversation with her, and he knew they had, at the most, only minutes before they would no longer be alone.

"No signal...but it's got some charge," Olivia said handing the phone to Elliot, who put it in his pocket before gently caressing her cheek, determined to show her how much he cared.

"We get past the meeting, then outside - then we try and get a signal. Whatever happens we stick together. _Liv_ …" he began, his voice trailing off with uncertainty.

" _El...I_..." Olivia began softly, but jumped, startled as the door opened quickly as Robert rushed in.

He shut the door behind him and stood motionless, staring at Olivia and Elliot. Realising their close proximity, Elliot stepped back, hoping that they hadn't given anything away.

Robert turned his attention to Olivia, and stared hard at her before speaking, his voice disclosing his hurt.

"Anything going on between you two that you want to tell me about?"

"No - of course not, _we're partners_ , Robert!" Olivia said quietly, taken aback by his sudden appearance.

Robert remained silent as he stared at Olivia - she could see the tension building in him and she knew she had to diffuse the situation...and fast.

"Robert, he was just trying to help me...I'm sure I have at the least a cracked rib." Olivia said.

"She's hurt and I'm concerned for her, thats all," Elliot said, sounding far more confident than he felt.

"Really - because when I'm concerned about someone I don't _kiss_ them," Robert said, anger building in his voice.

"Robert...we..." Olivia was uncertain, glancing at Elliot.

"I don't know what you _think_ you saw, but let's talk about it later, OK?" Elliot said.

"OK, yeah youre right - this isn't the time…" he replied a little too dismissively. "OK let's go, let's make sure you get through that door." Robert replied.

They all remained silent as they exited the room and made their way up the steps and into the hall. All of the people in the hall were silent and still - they appeared to be in meditative states, and Elliot hoped, deep ones.

They got to the door, Olivia matching their pace despite how sore and bruised she felt. When they reached the door she slid the key into the lock and Elliot pushed the door firmly, opening it to a flood of daylight which was hard to bear. The flood of natural light almost bombarded their senses after so long in the dim artificial light.

Going through quickly they shut it again, not wanting to alert the others.

Elliot immediately pulled out the phone and began making a call, as he waited, silently praying that he would get a signal, he glanced at Olivia and frowned. Robert was staring hard at her and she looked away, in obvious discomfort at the intensity of his stare.

"The signal's patchy at best out here," Robert began, his hard gaze not leaving Olivia as he spoke, "I doubt you'll have any luck there, but i'm glad we all have this chance.. _.to be alone together_.."

Elliot stepped away slightly and began talking quickly as Robert glanced at him in surprise, muttering a curse. Elliot kept his eyes on Olivia the whole time, watching her reaction cautiously as Robert stepped closer to her.

"You want to know something, Olivia?" Robert said, with an unsettling tone to his voice.

"What's that?" she asked.

"I told you I loved you - but you never said it back, and now I know why. Now I know why you left me. I could forgive you for using me to get into this place - like I said, I'm not a total monster, I don't want to see kids get hurt...but Olivia...you and your partner... _now_ it all makes sense."

"What do you mean? Look, I don't know what you _think_ is going on..." she began, but stopped as he stepped forward suddenly, reducing the distance between them in an instant.

Elliot hurried his conversation, taking a step toward them both also.

"You can't say you love me, because you love him... _don't you_? You can't even admit it! I saw you in there - there are cameras all over this place - I saw you kissing him!" His voice rose, and Olivia's eyes grew wide in shock as he suddenly reached behind him and pulled a gun, aiming it directly at her. " _You never loved me because you're in love with your partner, you slut!"_ he shouted.

"DROP IT!" Elliot yelled, as he lowered the cell phone, vaguely aware of the voice on the other end of the line asking him what was happening.

"You don't want to do this Robert," said Olivia, as she tried to keep her voice steady.

"You're right Olivia, I don't wanna do this...you're mine and I'm not gonna let you go that easily," he said.

In one fluid motion, he gave a nervous laugh as he turned the gun and fired.

Olivia screamed in horror as Elliot dropped to the ground.

She rushed to Elliot's side, her hands moving straight to his shirt which was quickly seeping on the right with blood. She pressed down hard, tears springing to her eyes as he groaned in pain.

Robert walked towards them, his gun held at his side as he stared at her.

" _What have you done?"_ she said, stunned as she looked up at him, staring in shock as she kept pressure on his wound.

"Simplifying life, Olivia - removing your temptation," he said menacingly.

 _"YOU BASTARD!"_ she yelled, as her anger and fear escalated.

Looking down at Elliot as her hands began to feel warm and wet with his blood, the rest of her simply felt cold and numb with shock.

" _No...no...no!" Olivia sobbed._

Robert laughed as he moved closer and grabbed her arm, wrenching her away from Elliot. She sobbed and struggled as he pulled her violently towards him, the blood on Olivia's hands quickly covering Robert as she fought him hard.

 _"Oh God! Elliot!"_ she sobbed as panic began to fill her with adrenalin. With some effort she twisted slightly so that her mouth was closer to Robert's arm, and lunged, sinking her teeth hard into him, drawing blood.

Robert cursed and momentarily let go of her, but quickly grabbed her roughly around her neck pulling her back against him.

In her panic and shock as she struggled to get back to Elliot she didn't even feel the cold steel of the gun against her head. Focused completely on Elliot, it was only his words that alerted her.

 _"Liv...no!"_ he gasped in horror.

Olivia stopped moving as the look on Elliot's face changed from pain to fear, and she knew right away that that fear was not for his own well being, she recognised that look and knew that his fear was for her. Suddenly she became all too aware of the gun against her head, and she froze.

 **I'm sorry for the cliffhanger! Don't hate me! But don't worry - it certainly doesn't end here - I held off posting this chapter until the next one was well under way as that would have been a bit of a bad cliffhanger to leave you on for very long!**


	6. Chapter 6

**I had this all ready to go and forgot to update it! Sorry!**

 **We are getting nearer to the end here, 2 more chapters to go. Do check out Distance, T rated multi chapter and if you like M rated EO action - Resistance which will be uploaded tonight :-)**

 **Thank you for reading :-)**

 **PRECINCT**

The squad room had sprung to action as soon as Fin answered Elliot's call. He begun a trace immediately and stood up, shouting to alert everyone that they had got their location.

Cragen dispatched local police to the area, and with the call on speaker, they all listened in, drawing as much information from Elliot as they could. His tone had been rushed and they all tried to understand what was going in the background, but the sudden sound of a gunshot followed by Olivia screaming had thrown the room momentarily into a stunned silence. Not until Cragen took a deep breath and managed to compose himself enough to instruct Munch to dispatch a bus to the location, did they all begin talking again.

None of them could afford to lose momentum at that point - they couldn't be wavered by what they had heard, they had to reach Olivia and Elliot - _and fast._

 **SANCTUM RETREAT**

Olivia was forced to walk toward the door as Robert moved with the gun held against the side of her head. She felt sick and cold and could not focus on what Robert was doing. She knew she had to diffuse the situation, get Robert to put the gun down - but Elliot's blood coated her hands and she couldn't focus her mind - her thoughts were a jumbled confused mess, still reacting purely through shock.

As he opened the door and placed his hand on her back, she had no choice but to step through. Turning her head, she kept her eyes on Elliot until the door closed, now tears flowed freely down her cheeks and her breath came in rapid gasps at the sound of the key turning in the lock, separating her from him.

Olivia's eyes adjusted easily to the dimmer lighting of the hall, and she became acutely aware that the people inside had been alerted to their entrance, and had looked up, silently observing the scene unfolding in front of them. Realising that the situation had the potential to get even more out of control, she tried to slow her thudding heart enough to focus - to consider the children in the room who could end up hostages...or victims.

"Robert..." she began, battling hard to speak, "let's go back outside and we can talk there."

"Your _partner_ got through to someone on the phone - that was not supposed to happen!" he spat.

"Then you know they'll be coming, and soon. They heard a gunshot, this place will be surrounded. You can still make this better - _if you help Elliot_..." Olivia began, pausing as she noticed Emery walking quickly into the room.

He stopped and stared at Olivia, looking her up and down as he took in her appearance - the blood on her hands had transferred to her dress and had smeared on to Robert in the struggle outside.

"What do you think you're doing, Robert?" he said

"She...she isn't gonna walk away from me again..." Robert said, stammering, as he emphasised his point by jamming the barrel of his gun harder into Olivia's head.

Olivia flinched, and tried to shake off her shock and calm her breathing enough to talk.

"He shot Elliot - he needs an ambulance.. _.he's bleeding badly_ …" she said, her voice shaking.

Emery stepped closer, his eyes moving from Olivia to Robert as he watched them silently.

"PLEASE!" Olivia shouted, her voice desperate and panicked.

"I'm sure your cop friends will save him when they get here," scoffed Robert.

Emery's eyes flashed with anger at Robert's words and he was on him in a second, wrenching the gun from his hand and striking him hard across the face with it. As Robert fell to the ground with blood gushing from his mouth, Emery stepped back.

"You led the _police_ to us, Robert? To our _safe haven_? What were you thinking?" he said as he struck him hard across his face a second time.

"Get him out of here - isolate him," he said, gesturing to the audience in the room who mostly stared, transfixed at them.

A man and a woman quickly rushed over and hauled Robert up, pulling him to his feet as they moved him across the hall and out of the room.

Olivia ran for the door, and swore loudly as she felt Emery's hands grab her shoulders, pulling her back.

"No my dear, you are one of us, everything outside of that door is your past - you have a new life here with us."

Olivia struggled in his grip, "Let. Me. _Go_ ," she spat angrily, as she twisted attempting to break free of his grasp.

Emery pulled her backwards, his arms locking tightly around her body as the side of his face pressed firmly against hers.

"You need to let go Olivia, allow yourself to be free - with us!" he said, ignoring the moisture which her falling tears created - spilling on to him as he turned his face closer to hers.

"We have been compromised - we have to leave…" he paused as he raised his voice, pulling back from Olivia slightly to ensure he had the attention of the room.

"Our way of life is once again under threat - Robert has betrayed us, and led the authorities to us. Take what you can from the hall - leave anything else, we must evacuate immediately."

"Emery...I'll go with you, I promise I will, but please...let me see my partner - _I need to help him_ ," Olivia said, unashamed of the pleading tone to her voice.

Emery sighed as he spun her around, only relinquishing his grip on her momentarily as he looked at her, "I fear you will not come back to me if I let you go through that door to him. I cannot allow that - you and Elliot were to be my greatest achievements - Robert has cost me one of you already, I cannot risk losing you too."

"There will be police all over this place soon - I can help you, I can help you get away - but you have to do something for me first... _you have to let me help him_ ," Olivia said, feeling as though she were desperately clutching at straws - trying any angle that she could think of.

"I can see how much you care about him Olivia - but that's the problem - don't you understand? Your dedication...your connection, it is too strong, and it has no place here - you will leave with us… _.right now_."

Emery released his hold on her - leaving her confused briefly until she saw the gun in his hand. Silently admonishing herself for not being aware of where the gun was, she froze. She stared at the door separating her from her partner; lying bleeding on the ground outside, before returning her gaze to the small crowd of people now rushing around the room.

Emery raised the gun, and holding his arm out stretched, as if guided by the weapon and not his own action, he walked silently and quickly toward one of the children, who simply stared at him in confusion as he pressed the gun against her head.

"We leave now Olivia...I don't want to have to do this, but I know what it takes..." he turned and stared hard at Olivia, "I am in your head, and I know what it takes to make you comply. _We leave. Now_."

" _You will never be in my head_ ," Olivia said, her voice steadying a little, "Elliot made a call - they would have heard the gunshot, they won't waste any time - you will be surrounded soon with no way out."

Keeping the gun firmly against the girls head, he walked forward, giving Olivia no choice but to follow. He stopped at the door, silent and motionless as he waited for the others to gather around him.

Once all movement had ceased and the room fell silent, Olivia surveyed the small crowd. Rachel stared in obvious fear at the gun, but Olivia was struck by the impassivity of the others - she began to wonder what it would take to wake these people up and make them see what was going on around them.

After issuing some orders to the men in the group, and instructing the others to move out to the truck and climb straight inside, he unlocked the door. Moving the gun back toward Olivia and digging it into her side, Emery paused, his other arm blocking the door.

" _Olivia_ ," he said quietly and menacingly, "you are going to walk straight through this door and into the truck... _or I start shooting them_ \- and believe me, I will let you _watch_ me shoot everyone of them before I end it with you. You think they won't stand there and wait patiently while I reload?" he laughed. "Do I have your compliance or will it take a demonstration of my sincerity?"

"I'll do what you want," Olivia said with relative calm, the reality of the situation creeping into her state of shock.

"Lets go then," he said as he pushed the door open.

Olivia fought to focus her eyes quickly to see Elliot as Emery gripped her shoulder, the gun still painfully dug into her side. He moved her quickly around the side of the building where she caught only a fleeting glimpse of him.

Emery marched her into the truck, the others quickly following. As he shoved her on to the floor, she closed her eyes and felt absolutely sick as she felt him grip her wrist and secure it to a bolt with a cable tie. Her mind was filled with the image of Elliot lying still, the blood from the gunshot wound covering his shirt. Feeling utterly unable to help him she felt herself trembling as the cold reality of the situation hit her hard.

 _...Elliot lay motionless as the door opened._ He winced with the effort of trying to move but was woefully unable to. The pain coursed through him viciously as he tried to breath slowly and not panic. His thoughts were filled only with Olivia as he briefly saw her. Emery made sure that she had no time to see him properly and he couldn't fail to notice the unmistakable glint of steel as she was moved out of his view...

 _As he heard the doors slam closed on what he assumed was the same truck he and Olivia had arrived in, he used every ounce of strength that he could muster to stretch out his arm, and reach for the cell phone which lay inches from his reach. He couldn't tell whether the call was still active, but he assumed not as he couldn't hear anybody talking._

 _He quickly realised that it was a futile task to attempt to reach for the cell phone; the pain from the gunshot wound was making it near impossible to move. Breathing slowly and trying to remain calm, he looked up at the sky and tried to focus on something, anything except the situation and the pain that he was in:_

 _And then as the distant sound of sirens began to register in his mind, he focused on the one thing that would keep him going - the way Olivia felt when he held her, her lips against his, his hand on her cheek - her warmth, her smile. As the sounds of multiple police vehicles grew louder, he realised with a sickening fear that he was losing consciousness - Olivia remained his sole focus as he lost his battle and fell unconscious…._

 **STOCKWELL HOSPITAL**

By the time the team had arrived, Elliot was already out of surgery. Cragen dispatched Munch to the hospital while he and Fin worked with the uniformed officers at the scene.

Munch was torn between wanting to be on the scene, and realising the importance of finding out what Elliot could tell him - not least the concern he felt for his colleague and friend.

Munch paced the hall outside the room Elliot was recovering in, picking up his phone in a split second when it rang.

'Munch.'

'Is Elliot awake?' Cragen asked hurriedly.

'No, but he's been out of surgery for almost an hour now, it's looking good, he's gonna be OK, but he hasn't come round yet.'

Cragen sighed with relief, 'OK, as soon as he wakes, talk to him, get everything you can and relay it to me.'

'Will do - captain...do you have Olivia?'

'No, not yet. They vacated the place - Robert was here but he won't speak to us at all. We are searching the area and patrols are widening the search - there are a lot of beds inside this place so we are looking for a large group, they can't have gone far yet.'

'Elliot may give us what we need to find Liv.' Munch said.

'I damn well hope so.' Cragen replied.

 **SANCTUM RETREAT - THREE HOURS LATER**

Fin stood, leaning back against the wall as he stared hard at Robert, who was losing his resolve rapidly. He had barely said a word to him in over an hour, not planning on getting involved in pointless conversation - he didn't care how long he had to wait - Robert _would_ cave and start telling him what he needed to know soon.

Robert shifted uncomfortably from his spot where he was seated on the ground. He had intended to remain silent - that was what he had always been told to do when the authorities posed a threat to them, but he felt his loyalty slipping fast.

"Am I just gonna sit here all day?" Robert said finally

"Why'd they take off and leave you here?" Fin asked.

"Well...I broke a rule - that's how it works around here."

"Where did they go?" Fin asked, wanting to get to the point.

"I don't know - Emery keeps the evacuation plan to himself. He doesn't let us in on it. I lived with him for two years and when we evacuate, we just do what he tells us." Robert said truthfully.

Fin sighed and turned to leave before pausing and looking back at him, "What rule did you break then? What was so bad that they left you?

"I showed Olivia how much I loved her..." Robert began, but his sentence was cut short as Fin reacted to his words in a second, crossing the room and reaching him before he realised what was happening.

Fin grabbed his shoulders and heaved him up, slamming him hard against the wall, " _What the hell did you do to her_?"

Robert winced in pain as his back and head connected with the hard wall.

"You _are_ gonna tell me what you mean by that," Fin said, punctuating his sentence by slamming him even harder against the wall. "ANSWER ME, you son of a

bitch!"

Robert flinched as the door opened and Cragen entered. He didn't know whether it was premature to feel relieved at this interruption, or if he should be more concerned now that Fin had company.

"What's he given you, Fin?" Cragen asked, as Robert began to panic.

"The bastard says he 'showed Liv how much he loved her', that's why they left him behind. She sure as hell wouldn't wanna do anything with this creep," Fin spat.

"I didn't...God that's not what I meant...I didn't hurt her - I love her… it's not like that, I swear to you!"

"He's telling the truth Fin - it's not what he did to Olivia - _apart from holding her at gunpoint of course_ ," Cragen said, watching as Robert's eyes flashed with alarm and panic, "Elliot's awake - arrest this piece of crap for the attempted murder of a police officer."

Fin swore loudly, spinning Robert around and shoving him up against the wall as he cuffed his hands behind his back, before taking hold of him and reading him his rights as he pulled him roughly from the room.

Cragen chose not to react as Fin connected Robert's head with the door frame as they walked through. Robert cried out in pain and alarm, but got no reaction from Cragen or Fin. It was all Cragen could do not to do the same.

With the knowledge gained from Elliot of the size of the group as well as the type of vehicle they were looking for, it took them almost three hours to track down the truck's location. It had been last seen passing a gas station around forty miles north of the retreat. With the aid of a helicopter search team they had located the truck to the rear of a farmhouse. Cragen stood at the front of the assembled police vehicles, determined that the hostage negotiators would tread lightly and that no one would push Emery to act.

"One of my people is in there - DO NOT move in," he ordered.

Fin surveyed the scene; Cragen was worried but focused - it was the SWAT team that bothered him. They were keen to move in, and despite wanting to just go in there and pull Olivia out himself, he knew it was a huge risk. If anyone pushed their hand too quickly, it could end badly.

Inside the farmhouse basement Emery paced back and forth in front of the group who were seated on the floor. Most watching him passively, while Rachel appeared almost panicked.

Olivia was focusing, trying hard not to think about Elliot. The fact that she could do nothing to help him was a horrible feeling, and not knowing if he had got to a hospital in time was something her mind couldn't even process.

She focused on the room - having heard sirens approaching, Emery had moved them all down into the basement, and had secured Olivia's wrist again to a bolt on the floor. This time it was slightly looser, which afforded her a little more mobility, and was not cutting into her wrist as it had been in the truck. The basement was littered with rubbish strewn across the floor, and she took note of a tool box which she could possibly reach - _if_ Emery were distracted enough...

She glanced at the one window in the room, knowing that snipers would be concentrating on it to try and go for a shot. She closed her eyes briefly as she glanced at her blood covered hands - she _had_ to focus - she couldn't afford to think about anything else. Her heart ached - the pain of not knowing if Elliot was alive tortured her, but she battled hard to concentrate on the situation she was in. A room full of people were depending on her to make it out of their alive - whether they seemed to care about their own welfare or not.

Emery paced continuously, his gun in his hand, occasionally stopping to look at them all - his eyes roaming over the small crowd who sat passively and waited on his word.

"Do you want to tell people about your world? To show them how they can live outside of society?" Olivia said, as she watched him cautiously.

"Of course I do," he said as he approached her.

"Then making it out of here alive means you can do that. They will come in eventually and _they will kill you_ \- do you really want your voice silenced?"

Emery watched her, taking in her words, " _Don't play me Olivia_ ," he seethed.

"I don't want to play you - I just want to make sure nobody dies,"

Emery crouched down in front of her - his face close to hers as he smiled evilly, " _Nobody else_."

He noticed the flash of pain in Olivia's eyes immediately and knew he had some degree of leverage over her emotions with that statement.

"We were in a remote location - your people would have taken some time to get there. He wouldn't have survived that. Robert had a good aim, didn't he?" he stood up, looking down at her, "impressive really - but I bet your people make sure he meets with an accident, now that he has a cops blood on his hands."

He raised his arms up, as he passed slowly around the room, "That's what happens when you choose a different path - when you betray me. This is a lesson for you all not to let the outside world pollute you."

Olivia took a breath, blinked back the tears which she cursed herself for letting rise to the surface and stared hard at him.

" _My people_ got to him - when a cop is down believe me they don't hesitate," Olivia said with determination.

Emery stopped, lowering his arms as he laughed, "Oh how you wish that you believed that."

The sound of the hostage negotiator through the loudspeaker distracted him momentarily and Olivia quickly wiped away a stray tear that was betraying her attempt to not let Emery get to her.

"That's the hostage negotiator - don't ignore them - it will go bad fast if you don't communicate. They will want to get a phone in here and open a line of communication," Olivia said.

" _Nobody_ is going out there," Emery said.

"Go to the window and open it, then you can hear what they're saying. They will be telling you that they have left a phone on the porch," Olivia said.

Emery watched her intently - debating whether she was trying to trick him.

"I'm not going anywhere near that window - _you_ get it," he said, gesturing to Rachel.

He grabbed her arm and walked quickly up the basement stairs. Olivia looked around the people who sat in silence around her.

The lack of reaction from them shocked her - but she noticed a slight hesitancy creeping across some of their faces at his absence from the room. This was replaced by relief as soon as he came back, and then he shoved Rachel down on to the ground again.

Almost immediately the phone began to ring.

"Pick up, Emery," Olivia said.

"SHUT UP!" he shouted, "I do things on _my terms_!"

The phone stopped ringing briefly before resuming again - Emery walked over to Olivia and leant down, thrusting the phone toward her.

" _You answer it_ ," he said angrily.

Olivia took the phone and pressed the button to accept the call as she held it to her ear.

'This is Detective Benson.'

' _Olivia_ ,' Cragen said, relieved, "what's the situation in there - is anyone hurt?"

'Nobody needs medical attention...there are fifteen other people here, two children..."

Emery walked over to her and grabbed her other wrist, twisting it painfully down against the bolt on the floor. Olivia cried out and dropped the phone, staring up at Emery.

"You will tell them, that I will open fire and end every single person in this building unless they give us safe passage out of here."

He handed Olivia the cell phone and released her wrist as she winced in pain.

'He will shoot everyone in here unless he gets safe passage out of here,' she said, trying to steady her voice through the throbbing pain in her wrist.

'Get him on the line Olivia,' said Cragen.

Olivia knew she had an opportunity to ask about Elliot, and that if she handed over to Emery she might not have another chance. In truth, she was terrified of the truth - if he was dead, she couldn't hear that right now - and then wouldn't be any use to the people whose lives depended on her...and she wanted to keep the hope that he had made it - little else was holding her together.

"They want to talk to _you_ ," she said flatly.

Emery paused before taking the phone, hearing only his side of the conversation she focused on anticipating the next move.

'You will let me leave here, with my people - _all of my people_ , Olivia is one of us,'

Olivia flinched at his words, knowing the decision on how to act would be significantly affected by holding a police officer hostage.

'I will call you back in thirty minutes - not before that time. I will expect an acceptable solution to be worked out on your part, _or I will have to start shooting_. I'm sure you don't want that,' .he said, his voice low and deathly serious.

Olivia watched as he ended the call and placed the phone on the table, pausing before walking over to her. She felt a growing sense of unease as he stared down at her, silently.

Not wanting to show her discomfort she chose not to respond verbally, but simply returned his hard gaze.

"You need to submit to my will, Olivia - then you will see things from our world view - we are different, and when you pay me the price I will grant you freedom."

Olivia tensed at his words - acutely aware of the people in the room whose eyes fell on her, but remained silent.

He moved quickly toward her, kneeling down in front of her as he grabbed her free wrist, yanking it down hard, forcing her on to her back. Olivia winced as her head struck the hard surface of the floor, momentarily stunned as he dropped his weight onto her, straddling her.

Olivia felt a rising panic encompass her and froze, realising too late what he was planning to do. She felt herself trembling and her breath quickening as tears sprang to her eyes. She was in a room full of people but was on her own - she couldn't depend upon any one of them to stop this...

The next moments were a blur, as she struggled to stay in control of her reactions - determined not to let herself slip into a flashback - but feeling physically too weak to defend herself as he struck her. Olivia felt far away, what was happening to her in the crowded room seeming too strange to be real. She felt cold and distant, until she felt the material of her dress rising as he tore at it, and the bruising pressure of his hands on her thighs. She was too exhausted to fight, shaking too hard to focus enough to think.

Olivia was close to shutting herself down totally, when she was suddenly able to take a breath as he lifted his weight momentarily, reaching down and grasping her panties. The rush of air into her lungs jolted her back to reality, and in one desperate effort, she lunged toward the toolbox, somehow not reacting to the searing pain in her restrained wrist.

Grabbing the handle and tipping it over, she reached blindly, tears beginning to spill from her eyes as she felt him roughly pull her underwear down.

Grasping an object from the spilled toolbox, she lifted it, using every last remnant of strength she had left and brought it down, hard, on his head.

Emery barely made a sound as he collapsed, his body weight dropping on her, crushingly.

Olivia struggled to move underneath him, " _help me,_ " she said, as she used her free hand to push him to the side.

With some effort she eventually managed to roll him off of her, where he landed on the ground next to her. Taking a few deep breaths, she turned to the silent crowd staring at her. She was relieved to see that Rachel was hugging the children and had turned them away, protecting them from witnessing the scene that had unfolded before them.

" _The phone_.." she said, as every last ounce of her strength ebbed.

A woman rose, unsteadily, her eyes wide and frightened as she moved over, bending down and picking up the discarded cell phone. She stared at it before reaching out and handing it to Olivia without saying a word.

Olivia sighed as she pressed the button, calling Cragen. She had stopped Emery before he was able to hurt her too badly, and everyone in the room was coming out alive, but suddenly her thoughts were filled with nothing but her partner - the man she loved, and had never told. Steadying her voice, she quickly relayed that they could enter, before closing her eyes and allowing her tears to fall as the exhaustion washed over her.


	7. Chapter 7

**Sorry for the delay - there is one more chapter to go after this.**

Fin sat in the ambulance as Olivia was taken to the hospital - he couldn't help smiling at her, she sat up despite the paramedics best efforts to keep her lying down and she looked nothing less than annoyed at having to be in an ambulance at all. He could tell she was fighting waves of dizziness, but she was not letting it keep her down. As soon as he had told her that Elliot was going to make it, her exhaustion and every ache in her body seemed to dissipate and become replaced with an energy that surprised even her. This was positive adrenaline, and now she felt awake and determined, and anxious to see Elliot.

"What's so funny Fin?" she said, with a hint of annoyance.

"You Liv - the way you were negotiating with Cragen and the ambulance driver," Fin laughed.

"Negotiating?"

"Yeah - no way were you getting checked out, 'till you realised you could have a ride straight to Stabler. Good move making sure they were going to the same hospital."

Olivia gave a smile, accompanied by a slight wince as she tried to ignore the throbbing headache she now carried, "How's he doing?"

"Munch said he's doing real good Liv, surgery went well and he is awake and talking now. You know what the first thing he said was?"

"No what?"

" _Where's Olivia_ ," smiled Fin, "you know, no one else is gonna say this, but you two really gotta see what's in front of you."

"What's in front of us? What do you mean?"

Fin laughed, "You and Stabler - you're the only two who don't know," he said, shaking his head, "you want some advice?"

"Sure, go on then...what advice do you have for me?"

"You two just don't get it at all - look Liv just cut the crap, you didn't know if he was gonna make it tonight, everyone else can see there's something between you two - _everyone except you_. Admit it to yourself, life's too short."

Olivia stared at Fin incredulous, before sitting back and smiling, and then she pondered his words :

 _She had kissed El, and she knew undoubtedly how he felt about her, but she had resisted crossing the line completely. The circumstances hadn't allowed for them to take anything further but she felt a pang of regret and not having told him how she felt about him._

 _She needed to see Elliot - the last image she had of him was burned into her mind - in pain and bleeding, and her heart ached for him. It hurt her immeasurably that she could have lost him and he never would have heard her tell him how she felt._

Olivia sighed and glanced at Fin.

" _I really need to get my act together_."

 **STOCKWELL HOSPITAL**

Fin didn't bother suppressing his laugh, which only irritated the paramedics, when Olivia deftly slipped away from them, refusing any treatment until she had seen her partner. Anticipating her actions, Fin had already sent a text message to Munch who had relayed the location of Elliot's room - they headed straight there, Olivia going much slower than usual, and accepting Fin's offer to support her.

When they reached the room, Fin pushed the door open and Munch got up from the chair next to Elliot's bed. Fin stepped back as Olivia shook off his hold on her arm, turning her head briefly to him as she mouthed a quick thank you. She walked toward the chair, dropping down into it, exhausted.

Her heart filled with warmth as she looked across at Elliot, their eyes meeting for the first time since the shooting.

"You OK baby?" Elliot said, the warmth, concern and affection in his voice so clear that Munch and Fin exchanged a glance.

"Gonna leave you two alone to catch up," Fin said smiling as he and Munch turned to leave, "Liv, let them check you out soon though OK?"

Olivia smiled and nodded as they left, before turning back to Elliot.

Elliot frowned at her, "Liv - you haven't been checked out yet?"

"I'm not the one with a gunshot wound, I'll let them look at me soon, I just…. _I had to see you_."

"I had to see you too...but you're OK? I've been here for hours, and you've only just got here - the last time I saw you that bastard had a gun to your head. I just kept thinking…. _if I lost you_ …"

"I'm fine - _and I mean it El_. He tried to get to me - to get in my head, but I wouldn't let him in."

"Liv," Elliot began, trying and failing to shift over in the bed, "come here - I wanna hold you."

Olivia gave a small smile and brought her chair closer, leaning forward in a reasonably comfortable position to place her head on the side of his chest, well away from his wound. He brought one arm around her, and she shifted her weight slightly, so that she was partially on the bed. She was careful in her movements, and Elliot wanted so badly to just pull her into his arms without any hesitation.

"You didn't have that cut on your cheek before - what did Robert do? Be honest with me, Liv.."

"Emery had the gun off him pretty fast, but he was going to shoot people if I didn't go with him - he held a gun to a little girls' head El - I had no choice."

"What did that bastard do Liv? Tell me what happened.."

"I'm OK, _really._ He tried to rape me, but.."

" _I swear to God Olivia,_ that son of a bitch is gonna pay for that," Elliot began, enraged by her words, "when I can get up and get the hell out of here…"

"When you get out of here Elliot, _you_ are going to spend time recovering, and you are going to let Fin and Munch handle him….once he regains consciousness."

Elliot calmed slightly and smiled, "How did that happen?"

"I knocked him out - it was creepy though...all those people they just say there..watching. Rachel was the only one who did anything - she turned the kids away so they didn't see...but the rest of them..I'm amazed I didn't break my wrist trying to get free - and they would have just sat there and watched. These people are so brainwashed - they are going to need some serious therapy to get back to anything resembling normal."

Elliot rested his head back on the pillow and smiled. Feeling him move, Olivia looked up.

"You knocked him out even though he had you restrained? _That's pretty impressive Liv_ ," smiled Elliot.

Olivia smiled back, and felt a small shiver at the obvious strength of feeling Elliot held for her. She didn't look away - she didn't want to back away from the love she felt from him. She was relieved to be sitting by his side, even if he was going to take some time to recover, he was alive and would recover from this.

Olivia took a deep breath and looked at him, a warmth spreading through as she met his eyes.

"El..I was scared that I would lose you today - and I couldn't bear it if you never knew... _you know though don't you_?" she said somewhat uncertainly.

" _Know what Liv_ "? he said, feeling slightly concerned.

Olivia looked away and took a breath before meeting his eyes again, her expression warm and loving.

" _I love you Elliot_ \- and we really shouldn't... _waste_ any more time...I need you to know that I love you too."

Elliot smiled, " _Come here Liv_.."

Olivia leant forward and touched her lips against his. He met her kiss with a passion which surprised her given his condition. She broke away and ran her hand down the side of his face, smiling.

Olivia waited until Elliot fell asleep before listening to the doctor's advice and letting them check her out. Once they had finished, and she was finally left alone, she sat on the bed, above the covers, not planning on getting too comfortable, despite the exhaustion she felt both physically and mentally.

The door opened and Fin came in, giving her a smile.

"Hey Liv, Cragen and Munch are taking that asshole into custody - thought you should know."

"Thanks Fin," she said with a smile.

"Took three hours for him to wake up, how'd you manage to hit him that hard when you were tied to the ground?" Fin asked, his admiration quite clear.

"I'm not even sure - I just reacted. I was so scared when I realised what he was going to do - _I felt myself slipping,_ but somehow...I don't know, I guess I just had enough left in me to do it."

"You did good Liv, you took that son of a bitch down and no one got hurt - _you did good_ ," he said with a smile as he left.

Olivia eased herself down on the bed, she ached and had never felt more exhausted. Looking with annoyance at the drip going into her arm, she sighed, knowing that she needed to stay put until she was rehydrated.

So much had happened in the past few days that it almost made her head spin to think about it, but the thought of Elliot's kiss warmed her greatly. She was only vaguely aware of the doctor's assessment of her, given that she was focused more on getting a timescale for getting away and back to Elliot's room. She knew that she was in considerably better shape than her partner however, but he would take some time to recover - ultimately he was going to be OK, and while that horrible moment where she had been sick with fear when he had fallen to the ground bleeding, flashed in her mind fleetingly, it was quickly replaced by his arms around hers, his lips against hers - and the warmth and relief it filled her with was undeniable.

She rested her head against the pillow and gave a smile before falling quickly asleep.

 _Olivia awoke and tensed, her eyes darting around the room in confusion initially, until the realisation of where she was filled her mind. Sighing, she relaxed, sinking back against her soft pillows, just as there was a brief knock at her door before it opened._

Cragen came in, giving her a warm smile before sitting down in the chair next to her bed.

"How are you doing, Liv?"

"I'm fine - can't believe I slept so well - I didn't even wake up when they took the IV out," she said.

"You've had a hard few days - _do not_ ask me how soon you can come back to work," he said.

"It's just bruises... _well and a fracture_...but whatever they put in that IV last night really perked me up, so I just need a good meal and I'm fine...I'm just relieved Elliot's gonna be walking out of here.."

" _Me too Liv_ \- he was very lucky - _he had a very close call there_ , you need to take it easy as well though Olivia - I don't want either of you setting your recovery back by doing too much. I know you, and I know you will only play down your own condition. You are forgetting that you have me down as your next of kin along with Elliot.."

Olivia smiled, realising that she couldn't bluff, "OK, well maybe I could use a bit of time off..."

"Good to hear it - I don't know how you didn't dislocate your wrist - but thankfully a sprain and stitches won't keep you out of action for long. Fractures take time though Liv ...especially _three fractures_...don't push yourself too hard."

"I won't," she said, convincingly.

"You have to be very careful for at least the next two to three weeks with a facial fracture Liv, and rib fractures can be as long as six weeks - don't rush back - you'll only be on desk when you come back until you are cleared."

Olivia sighed, "OK."

Cragen smiled and shook his head as he stood up, preparing to leave her to rest for a bit before taking her statement. He wondered how long it would be before she was out of bed and into Elliot's room again. He knew that they would not leave each others side for long.

 **SIX WEEKS LATER**

Olivia turned the key in the lock and opened the door to Elliot's apartment - glancing around she spotted him on the couch and smiled as she closed the door, and dropped her bag onto the small table by the door.

"Hey Liv - missed you," he said with a smile.

Olivia glanced at her watch, "well I was gone for a little over three hours," she said returning his smile as she joined him on the couch, "I'm hardly ever at my apartment - there's a lot of mail to sort through. It's good to get out, I can walk about without much pain now."

"Liv..I love having you here..." he began, "we've taken pretty good care of each other haven't we? I like being with you like this - you brighten my apartment," he smiled.

"It's a good job you have a spare room though you know El...otherwise Cragen would be wondering where I'm sleeping…" she said, with a slight laugh as she moved over to the couch and sat down next to him.

Elliot smiled and lifted his arm, "come here Liv," he said.

Olivia smiled and moved along the couch, leaning against him comfortably.

"We were pretty lucky - it could have been so much worse. You know what worked out well though?" Elliot said.

"No, what's that?"

"Well, we both had to rest - I've loved all these evenings on the couch with you; watching movies and taking it easy. Not something I get to do much."

Olivia smiled as she turned towards him and placed a soft kiss on his lips. Elliot responded by turning towards her and pulling her into his arms, deepening their kiss as his hands ran across her back.

Elliot winced slightly as he shifted, pushing her gently down on to the couch as he supported his weight, lying over her.

"You OK?" she whispered.

"Yeah, just a little sore sometimes when I twist, don't worry," he said as his lips trailed across her neck, "every night I hold you, and we kiss, and God I love kissing you, I could do it all day...I want to take you to bed so badly Olivia..."

Olivia arched her head back slightly, the light pressure of his lips against the sensitive skin of her neck sending shivers through her.

Her hands seemed to instinctively reach for him, sliding over his chest, and carefully avoiding the area around the scar from his bullet wound. Their eyes locked and he was struck by the rapidly increasing want he saw within her.

"El," she whispered, " _let's go to bed_."

Elliot watched her intently, as his fingers traced a path from her neck, down her side, skimming her breast.

"You sure Liv?"

"Very sure," she replied.

Elliot stood up, taking her hands as she rose carefully. Walking toward the bedroom, he stopped briefly at the doorway and raised her hand to his mouth, placing a kiss on her hand.

"I'm a lot better, but you still have some healing to do - I don't wanna hurt you."

"I'm healing well, I just have to be careful for a bit longer," she said, "Cragen was standing right next to me when I asked the doctor about resuming normal activities - I couldn't ask him about sex!"

Elliot laughed.

"I'm getting twinges now and again but nothing too bad - don't even need painkillers regularly now…. _i'm sure we can find a way_ …" she said sultrily.

"Well," Elliot said, as he led her to his bed, and sat down, pulling her gently down with him, " _I'll just have to be creative then_ …"

Olivia lay back on the bed as Elliot crawled over her - his hands carefully supporting his weight as he looked down at her. They had yet to cross this boundary - but Elliot was much stronger now and Olivia was well on the way to recovery.

He shifted his weight so that he was lying to one side of her, leaning over as his hand ran up, under her shirt. Olivia smiled, her hand snaking up his back, settling on his neck as she pulled him down toward her.

Elliot leaned down, capturing her lips with his - their hands roamed hungrily - each letting go of the restraint they had held onto for the previous six weeks, but also mindful of the others potential weak points physically.

Elliot began to undo the buttons of her shirt, pulling the material open as his hands moved lower until he pulled the material of her shirt open fully, exposing her black lace bra.

Olivia's breath hitched at the look in his eyes, and he dropped his head to her stomach, placing kisses as his hands roamed her body. Olivia tried to stifle a giggle as his lips moved to her side, tickling her unintentionally.

Elliot laughed, his mouth warm against her skin, as his hands slid up to her waistband, tugging. She raised her hips as he pulled, slipping the material down, until he pulled it free from her body.

Looking down at her, Elliot could not hide his desire - he had never seen his partner look so beautiful - lying beneath him wearing so little, trusting him, wanting him; but the warmth in her smile as she looked at him was what really showed her beauty - the beauty within her heart.

Elliot lowered himself again, placing kisses on her inner thighs before slipping his fingers into her panties - Olivia gasped as she realised what he was going to do, and lifted her hips to assist him to undress her further.

As he moved down, she arched her head back, as his mouth began to send shock waves of pleasure throughout her body.

The next morning Olivia opened her eyes to the now familiar warmth of Elliot next to her. She smiled as she shifted position slightly and watched him.

Her eyes skimmed his bare chest, and she could not help the reflex to reach out and touch him. Placing a hand on his chest, she ran it lightly across his skin, feeling the tone and definition of his body under the light touch of her fingers. Smiling she ran her fingers from his chest over to his arm, tracing the outline of his tattoo before leaning forward to place a kiss on his arm.

Elliot stirred, opening his eyes and smiling, "you know, I could really get used to this - waking up next to you every morning."

Olivia smiled, "oh I could get used to this too."

" _Nothing stopping us baby_ ," he said, his voice dropping to that slightly lower tone which took on an almost seductive tone.

Olivia smiled, then propped herself up on her elbow as she looked at him, a hint of concern in her gaze.

"Do you think Cragen will realise?" she said.

Elliot turned to his side and propped himself on his elbow too, mirroring her position as he reached over and stroked her cheek gently.

"He might - we'll just have to take it as it comes."

Olivia looked down fleetingly before bringing her eyes back to his, "I don't want a new partner - I don't want to lose what we have El,"

Elliot sighed and took her hand, bringing it to his lips and placing a kiss on her fingers.

"We have something even better now Liv - and we aren't gonna lose this...whatever happens at work - _we aren't gonna lose us_."

Olivia smiled and leaned forward, Elliot instinctively meeting her halfway as they slipped into a tender kiss.


	8. Chapter 8

**EPILOGUE**

The next four weeks passed by slowly - Olivia and Elliot both returned to active duty at the same time, which was a relief for them both. Olivia was feeling increasingly paranoid that someone would notice that there had been a shift in her relationship with her partner however. Elliot on the other hand had been quite relaxed about the concept - reminding her that there was little point in worrying about it unless anyone brought it up.

By now Olivia spent little time at her own apartment, although she had not made the move official. Elliot wasn't going to push her on that - he was just enjoying waking up with her every day and making love to her; he couldn't believe the way things had changed.

Their connection had been deeper than any he had ever experienced - always indescribable, but now that they had crossed that final boundary that connection was even deeper. He honestly felt like the luckiest man in the world - that his relationship with his best friend could be taken to such an intimate level; that he could have this amazing woman in his arms.

Elliot sat back in his chair as he glanced at Olivia who had stood up, grabbing her bag.

"You want a lift?" he said.

"I'm good, I have a date tonight actually," she smiled, "going to the store - I'm cooking tonight."

Elliot gave a small smile as he met her eyes with a carefully controlled gaze.

"Who's the lucky man then, Liv?" asked Munch.

"Yeah Liv, you've been keeping him quiet?" Elliot asked with a questioning, amused glance.

"Well I'm hoping I have better lucky with this one," she said smiling.

"Well, the last one shot your partner, so maybe I should meet him?" Elliot said, his voice laced with humour.

"Well, I'm keeping him under wraps for now, see you guys tomorrow," she said with a smile as she grabbed her coat and made her way out.

Elliot occupied himself finishing his paperwork, but his mind kept drifting to Olivia - when he was working with her he was focused and concentrated on the job but whenever she was not by his side, his mind would drift to her in very unprofessional ways. He couldn't help the way his thoughts would drift - usually to the night before, touching her, the feel of her skin under his hands, the touch of her lips against his...

"Stabler!" Cragen called.

Elliot looked up, realising that he had been completely lost in his thoughts.

"Sorry, yeah Cap?"

"My office."

Elliot made his way into his office and felt slightly uncertain when Cragen closed the door for privacy.

"Take a seat," Cragen said as he gestured to the chairs in front of his desk.

Elliot sat down, beginning to wonder what he he done.

"Has your partner already left?" Cragen asked.

"Yeah, she just left…."

Cragen gave a slight smile as he walked behind his desk and sat down.

"Then you can pass this on to her."

"Pass what on?" Elliot asked feeling slightly concerned.

"Look Elliot, I'll cut to the chase here - I'm happy for you both. You are the best team I have ever worked with and I want to see you both remain as partners. Just keep doing things as you are now and that won't have to change."

Elliot stared at him, stunned, "you know about us? I thought we were doing a good job of keeping our relationship away from our partnership…"

" _You are_ \- although it's never going to be as black and white as that, but you two have always been much closer than anyone else around here. I would never have known if I hadn't seen you both outside your apartment when I drove past," Cragen said with a smile.

Elliot let out a breath as he looked at Cragen, "When did you find out?"

"About three weeks ago - your relationship hasn't had a negative impact on your job Elliot, so as long as that continues then we are all good here, ok?"

"Ok, Liv'll be relieved, it's been kinda stressing her out," Elliot admitted.

"I bet, tell her not to worry - but Elliot?"

"Yeah cap?"

" _This is Olivia_...don't screw this up."

"I won't," Elliot said with a smile.

Elliot couldn't wait to get home that night - they ate together enjoying the meal she had cooked, and were relaxing on the couch together with a glass of wine each before Elliot spoke to her about it. Olivia was more than a little relieved and Elliot smiled as he watched the tension visibly leave her.

Reaching up, he lightly traced his fingers along the side of her face, as she leaned into his touch.

" _I love you Liv_ ," he whispered.

Olivia smiled, his declaration accompanied by his touch causing a small shiver.

"I love you too," she said as she put her wine glass down, before taking his and doing the same.

Elliot smiled as she put the glasses down on the table and returned her hands to him, running them up his arms before letting them rest on the back of his neck as she knelt next to him, their bodies touching.

Elliot looked into her eyes, and the desire and love that he saw within her flooded out to him.

Putting his hands around her waist he lifted her until she was sitting on his lap. Olivia shifted position so that she was straddling him, as he took her into his arms, their lips instantly finding each others.

Elliot placed his mouth on her neck, and enjoyed the feel of the slight shiver she gave at his touch. He loved to see the way he affected her - for so many years he had kept such a careful distance, but now he just couldn't get enough of her.

As she deepened their kiss, he pulled his arms around her tightly and lifted her as he stood up, carrying her. Her legs wrapped around his waist and their kiss became increasingly passionate as he carried her into the bedroom.

He only broke their kiss once he paused to place her on the bed. Lying back, she looked up at him, her eyes full of want and desire.

"Elliot…" she began, her voice low and sultry, "you know If I'm cleared for duty that means I'm ok for.. _all kinds of activities_."

Elliot climbed on to the bed, straddling her as his hands immediately went to her - running underneath her top, tracing the edge of her bra.

"Really? Well then...maybe we should test that out," he said with a smile as he leaned over her, supporting his weight, his hands either side of her.

"Oh, I think we should El," she said, smiling.

"You're beautiful Liv," he said with a whisper as he inched his body closer, feeling her against him as she arched her body up to meet him, "I love you."

Olivia moaned as his lips captured hers, and their hands roamed each other - they had no barrier anymore, no protocol or unspoken feelings preventing them from being together.

Elliot laced his fingers through hers as he entered her, making love to her. The feel of her body against his, the love in her gaze for him - he had never felt more content in his life.

 **Thank you to everyone who has read this story to the end. I really appreciate everyone who reads - it's awesome to be able to share these stories with you.**


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